why did the man break his arm? he didn't, someone else broke it for him

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Jesus on the cross promised he would return rite? So three days later he returns in ghost form and leaves. So why people still waiting for him? He returned and left already! (Lack of Moral?): The third coming: this summers blockbuster hit!

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A blond, a brunet, and a red head jumped off a bridge. Which one hit the ground first? In order to solve this problem you would first need to figure out witch of the three had more of a body mass. Then you would need to calculate the accretion in case one brought along a cow. However, in the end the outcome is always the same: 3 dead bodies on impact and 3 mourning families.

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How do you drown a blonde? Intentionally attempting to drown anyone, regardless of their hair color, is murder which is illegal and morally wrong to do.

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What is green and red and is going super fast? A frog in a blender.

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An egg and a sausage walk into a bar, and the barman says "sorry, we don't serve breakfast".

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what did little johnny get his grandfather for christmas?nothing his grandfather died on thanksgiving

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awkward moment when someone pretends to be Mr. Bear and stuffs up his own joke

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What did the boy with no parents get for Christmas from his Grampa? Nothing because his Grampa had alzheimer's disease -Flap

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Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait I shouldn't tell you, it's too long

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my parents let me say words that start with sh and end in it. shit what else could it be

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Whats worse than pulling down a girls pants and seeing a giant furry bush... finding out her vagina has teeth in it.

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A red and blue penguin are taking showers. The red penguin can't find the soap so he yells down the hall to the blue penguin "Hey, where is my soap?" The blue penguin replies, "What do I look like a typewriter?"

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Today I wanted to make world peace.... So I killed everyone.

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I walk in to a bar, ask for a beer, get drunk, walk away and.... hmmm.. how could I finish the joke??..

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what do chinese kids make for fathers day? shoes

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What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

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what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing, you already told her twice.

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What did the cow say to the Businessman? Nothing. Cows cant talk.

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Twilight is so bad, I read it and personally didn't like it as a book.

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All of these jokes are about white people

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? The chicken. The chicken always comes first, that's why the egg never comes at all.

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What happened when the boy stood up? He had all his limbs hacked off and soon after died.

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A Redhead, a Blonde, and a Brunette are all standing on top of a cliff in Ireland. They took a few pictures, and all in all it was a lovely vacation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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