How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poetry Show me your titties

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Why was Timmy crying? Because he got raped.

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hat did the fridge say to the oven your hot baby \

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what happens when you throw a green rock into a yellow pond. it makes a spash.

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(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, This joke is stupid, Chuck Testa.

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"You know what sucks?" "Vaccuumes?" "You know what metaforically sucks?" "Black holes?" "You know what just isn't cool?" "Lava?"

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How do you get a drugged man, a giant sombrero, and a guitar into a Chuck-E-Cheese? You take multiple trips.

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whaT DID HEVEN SAY TO THE FRIDGE hAVE YOU GOT A COLD

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Why did the chicken Cross the road? Because a Blackman was chasing his dinner

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2 biggest lies I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service and That baby dont look like me

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What's sad about this man who committed suicide? He forgot to return his rented DVDs.

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Q: What did the homless man get for chritsmas? A: Frostbite

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One day, a Hippo was riding a scooter and an ant was sitting on the back seat. Suddenly they meet with an accident. They both fall from the scooter on their heads but only the hippo gets hurt. How??? Because the ant was wearing a helmet.

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who is smarter than a human? a nerd

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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A Black man walks into the Dentist's office, because he cares about his hygiene.

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I am strangling you. Do you see my arms? I AM FREAKEN STRANGLING YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

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What did Yoda say to Darth Vader? The only time the two had talked Darth Vader was still Anakin therefor, he said nothing.

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Why'd the gay man get fired from the sperm bank? He was repeatedly late to work.

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Where does Charlie Sheen Shop? Winners

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no

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LET'S PLAY CARDS SHUFFLE THE DECK *person with a deck-patio* no please don't

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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