there once was a man, he was old, and he had one wish...do you wanna know that wish? Well i don't know it because he died two seconds ago from a heart attack. Oh Well...

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Guess what what?? chicken butt!!!!!

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What do you call a gay kid, a horrible singer, and has long hair for a guy? Justin Bieber

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whats white and sticky? a white stick

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Whats 9 plus 10? 19

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Why did the plane crash? Because a loaf of bread was the pilot.

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What do you call Metta World Peace after he has hit somebody? Metta World War.

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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I hear eating an apple a day keeps the other apples in check.

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What do you call a black man that is wearing a suit? Whatever his name happens to be

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Why do I have a Virtual Boy?

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Q:What happened after the snake tricked Adam and Eve into eating fruit from the tree of wisdom? A: Nothing, but the three of knowledge was a whole other story though. Moral Man.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the street? A: Because that was the direction it was headed.

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why did the fat woman die? ... because she tried to commit suicide and the ceiling collapsed on her.

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What do you call two black people in the same sleeping bag? A newly married couple on their camping adventure honeymoon.

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Why didn't the black kid get anything for Christmas? His family was Jewish.

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Why did the goat cross the road. To put his sacrifices into the pentagram.

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There is two guys named tard and retard on a boat in shallow water. they both fall off. Who gets back up onto the boat? - Obviously Tard because ur dealing with a retard here.

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so if your riding down a big hill in your canoe and your bicycle falls out how many pancakes do you have left? you would have 200 pancakes left --sticksack

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Attack her with a sanding machine.

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Three girls are walking in the woods they see tracks one thinks it is a bear the other thinks it is a deer the last one thinks it is a lion They all argue till they get hit by a train and realized they were train tracks

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Death by kayak

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Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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