Why did Timmy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because I kicked her in face! Why didn't she get back up? Because she didn't have any friends!

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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A Chinese man fails a math test

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Lightning strikes 2 year old baby.

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An irishman walks into a bar and drinks 6 pints of guiness. He then drives himself home and savagely beats his wife and children.

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Roses are red, violets are red, sunflowers are red, HOLY CRAP, MY GARDENS ON FIRE!

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A: What do you call a deer with no eyes? A: I got NoEyeDeer!!!

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There was a joke, one sentance, and no punchline.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped.

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Why did the black man take the watermelon? Because he bought it, and watermelons are delicious.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzhiemers Wait, who are you

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What'd the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? New shoes and some gloves

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Tommy was excited to get a tattoo of a falafel on his wiener. He got skin cancer.

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Why would a dog sniff another dog's butt hole? Because that is what they do.

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Bläeghen-Fassybìll-No?cheb!

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What do you call a white guy in a mostly black neighborhood? His name.

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What's worse than finding a work in your apple? The Holocaust.

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A rat and a pig rape a puppy. Hey, that's just life.

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Why was little Jimmy sad? Because his mum died.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because yo mama so fat and the pig ate my poop

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What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

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Tim and Jim are Telling Jokes Tim: Knock Knock ... Jim does not respond because Tim has a mental disorder causing him to believe in hypothetical doors and thus ignores him so that he does not upset his friend

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What's louder than a cat stuck in a tree? A foghorn.

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What is a pirate's favorite movie? A pirated movie.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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