Whats the difference between a kangaroo and a kangeroot ? Ones a marsupial. The others a Geordie stuck in a lift.

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A man is at the doctor's office and the doctor says to the man: "I'm sorry sir, you have AIDS and Alzheimer's disease." The man says: "Well, at least I don't have AIDS!"

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What is a pirates favorite crime? Piracy, which is still a serious problem in today's society.

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You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

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No smoking No eating No drinking On this bus Didn't say anything about sniffing

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Whats 9 plus 10? 19

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how do you upset an obese cat? you put her in dog sweaters

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What does it take to make the best anti-joke ever? not this

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why couldnt the african child eat enough food? he didnt have a mouth.

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There is a Asian a black guy and a white guy the black guy loves apples the white guy loves pears and the Asian loves Macaroni the white guy gets a apple the black guy gets a pear and the Asian has no lunch so the black guy kills the white guy for the apple and the Asian kills the black guy because he is hungry

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What's black and white and red all over? A Nazi banner.

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Why do showers have 11 holes? Because Jews only have 10 fingers

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Why did the goat cross the road. To put his sacrifices into the pentagram.

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roses are red, violets are blue with a face like yours, you belong in a zoo but don't worry, cos I'll be there too not in the cage but laughing at you!

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whats worse than having the flu? having cancer

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Where does Mario go after you finish the game? Drug rehab.

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How do you get a black person out of a tree? Tell them to come down

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Hey man, you the tall one! Yes? Do you understand me? No. But you do overstand me right? Yeah, I overstand most people.

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how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

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What is worst than Justin Bieber new album? Being a jew during the holocaust or aids.

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Three girls are walking in the woods they see tracks one thinks it is a bear the other thinks it is a deer the last one thinks it is a lion They all argue till they get hit by a train and realized they were train tracks

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Why didn't the 1 month old chicken cross the road? Because by that time it's already a Mcnugget.

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Yo mamma so fat she has to have anti biotics to keep her alive

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Why didnt the boy finish the race? Becuase he stepped on a land mine.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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