What do you say to a disabled man in a lift? Have a nice day.

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Whats black and flys out of a car? Pupies stuffed in a bag.

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What's a good joke? France going to war and winning.

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What is the difference between a dog and pile of dead babies? One of them is alive.

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My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

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What did Michelle Obama get for Christmas? Cancer

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this isn't meant to be a joke, but just letting all of you know, inside jokes don't count and kony jokes aren't funny

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what did the panda say to the poachers? please stop killing my family.

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I started a pottery course where the two instructors looked like Demi Moore and Patrick Swayze. The only other student looked like Whooping Goldberg. This teacher to student ratio proved invaluable as I am hoping to make a living as an artist and really appreciated all the extra attention.

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What would you call it if Justin Bieber had sex with a woman? Sex, because thats what it is.

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs laying at your doorstep? Matt.

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Two guys walk into a bar.The barmen says "sorry we are closed." So the two men reply "There isn't a closed sign on the door and the door was open so we assumed it was OK to come in and have a drink". The barman says "Sorry we are closed at the moment but come back in 20 minutes and I can serve you". So the men leave and come back for a drink in 25 minutes time.

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Q what r u eating under there? Aunderwear ewww thats nasty

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being disturbed by two black guys raping a young girl with leukemia

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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the only thing i learned in geometry is when you push two circles together it makes a titty venn diagram

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How many lesbians did Tiger Woods bang? None, his standards are much higher than that

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What did the man say to th tiger? Nothing, a tiger is a dangerous and vicious animal. It then ripped him to pieces. Is family mourned after for a very long time till they came to grips with the death of the main income in their family. Aids

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Knock knock Who's there Isabelle Isabelle who? Is-a-bell necessary on a bike

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A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

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What's worse than falling out of a tree and landing on a dog? Rape.

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How did the fat man die? He was fed porrage until he died. Who killed the fat man? Leonardo DaVici How did Leonardo Da Vinci die? Natural causes (Actually I have no idea how Leonardo Da Vici died but if I am wrong please correct me) Thank You for your coperation.

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How do you keep a black man from hanging around your tree? You cut the rope.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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