Roses are red, Violets are dead, I've climbed through your window, I'm under your bed.

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Why wouldn't joey pay attention in class? Because he was being raped by a grizzly bear.

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Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

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A dancer walks into a barre

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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Sarah: Knock knock. Jim: Who’s there? Sarah: It’s me, Sarah. Open the door. Jim: It’s me Sarah open the door who? Sarah: Please Jim, it’s freezing out here. Jim: That wasn’t a very funny joke, Sarah. Sarah: Shut the fuck up and let me in. Jim: Ok.

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Three girls are walking in the woods they see tracks one thinks it is a bear the other thinks it is a deer the last one thinks it is a lion They all argue till they get hit by a train and realized they were train tracks

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says 'Why the long face?' The horse says 'My alcoholism is destroying my family.'

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Wat did the man say to the other man when they were alone. We dont know. They were alone.

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A blond, burnette, and red head walk into a bar. They sit together and enjoy a few drinks while catching up on eachother's lives.

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What did the businessman do to get a promotion? He traded oral sex for his male bosses kind heart...

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why did stuart buy an ipad from the mall. because he wanted an ipad

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A man walks into a bar. He bumps his head on the iron and has headaches for a week.

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Your moms so fat she struggles to to everyday tasks

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What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

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Yo momma so fat shes eating right now

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why was 9 afraid of 6 ? because it made her pregnant

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What did John say to Tim Hi I'm John

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Why did two girls need one cup? they didnt feel like washing an extra dish to drink their coca cola

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Yo mamma so fat she has to have anti biotics to keep her alive

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Q: What did osama bin laden say to the worker behind the gas station counter? A: May I buy this bag of chips?

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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Did you hear about Osama Bin Laden? He's dead.

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What is funnier then 25 9/11

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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