Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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why did the girl slap joe? he had a boner.

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Santa Claus and eight reindeers walk into a bar. “Hey, fatty,” the barman shouts. “Where’s Rudolph?” “He’s dead,” Santa replied. “I’m sorry to hear that,” the barman said, looking embarrassed. “Let me get you a drink.”

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is both deaf and blind. Driving would be an extremely hazardous action for herself and other nearby drivers.

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Wanna hear a joke......... your moms face !!

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Some people devote their to talking in their head. Jesus christ.

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whats bad about being black and jewish they have to sit in the back of the oven

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How many women does it take to changed a light bulb? 12. 11 to form a committee and 1 to make her boyfriend do it.

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I'm Coming

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Man walks into a hotel on Friday, Stays for three days and leaves on Friday. How is this possible? A. His horses name was Friday

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What do you call your female dog? Your bitch

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In Soviet Russia you don't drive car, because the Soviet Union was disbanded in 1991

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Your mommas so stupid she decided to go to night school to better her self. She got a degree in business and finance and is now a manager for HSBC

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I used to work as a human cannonball. I thought I was going to get fired, however during one performance the trajectory was miscalculated and I ended up severely damaging my spinal cord. I now work from home as a IT consultant. It's depressing.

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What is big, green, fuzzy, and would kill you if it fell on you? A pool table.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Dead.

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What's the difference between a black man and a orange? One is a fruit and other isn't

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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Two Scientologists walk into a bar. For $5,000 you can hear the rest of this joke.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupter. Interrupter who? Interrupter Jones.

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Why did the boy jump off a cliff Because he was gay and committed suicide

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How many blondes can you fit in a car? About 5 if you lift the arm rest.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.... Knock, Knock, Who's there?: Not Sarah

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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