A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want to hear first?" The man responds "I'd like to hear the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance covered everything." The man hangs his head and tears up as he asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor heads for the door as he answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments or appointments will be paid for." The man snaps his fingers and says "Damn! I should've voted Democrat!"

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What do you call a cross between a dog and a bumblebee? One messed up lab experiment!

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Q: What's the worst part about having sex with a cougar? A: Dying...

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I insist, you go ahead. See you around. how about in four six hours?

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the man walked into the bar and said ur gay

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I was there when Lebron James hit a home run to win the Super Bowl.

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were at work systems r down

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Knock knock Whose there? Nobody Nobody who? ......................................

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Why are Indians so bad at football? Curry

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What is yellow and bright? The sun.

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I popped my head over my sexy neighbour's fence today to see her lying in her bikini. "Wow, you're gorgeous!" I burst out, "I hope you know how to do CPR." "Why?" she asked with a giggle, "Because I've taken your breath away?" "No," I replied. "I've just run your son over out front."

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What did the frat guy drink after he lifted? A various assortment of beverages that were chilled at a cool 66 degrees.

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Your mums a potato

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Once there was this duck. he was the best dentist in the world...

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Why did the deer cross the road? To cause the car crash that killed my father when i was just 15 years old.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm using my hand but thinking of you.

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Why couldn`t Sally open the jar? Because she did not have thumbs.

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What was the racist kid's least favorite ice cream flavor? Chocolate for an unrelated reason.

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A man rode into town on Friday and came out on Friday how did he manage this? He stayed for a couple of hours

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Why did the asian lady buy the large shirt instead of the medium? Because the medium didn't fit

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Try this on some random person on the street... You: "Excuse me sir, do you know how to get to Farnsworth Street?" Man: "Sorry, no" You: "OK, you go straight ahead, then turn left on the second street. Continue about 200 feet, then......"

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whos best at KS3 irish and is sexy? tiarnan i lied about the sexy part

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A man walks into a bar, sits down and talks to the woman sitting next to him. The woman took out a cigarette, and offered one to the man. The man said yes, even though he never smoked before, because he was trying to get with the woman. They smoked a few more before the woman left, and the man left shortly after. The man became a chain smoker and died 1 year later from lung cancer caused by smoking multiple packs a day.

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What do you get when you cross scabies with genital warts? Krusty Krabs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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