guess what my weiner dog did last night? pooped in my bed

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Q: yugdyijgdripgdghd A: sorry I'm retarted. I don't know wtf I'm doin

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What do you do when life gives you lemons? You eat them.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse's mother had terminal cancer

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roses are red violets are microwaves i have amnesia what ma name iiizzz 'SHAWTAY

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Hah, I bet a faggot that lost his balls in the war is "above" such things as seduction and all things straight! 25 million US dollars, send them to me within a week, or I will hunt you down by tracking down every single one of your fucking followers (all six of them), and make you wish you where dead. And tell me where you live, send me your sister so I can rape her, send me your boyfriend so I can cut him to pieces, send my your children so I can make sure your genes stop, send my your mothers tits so I can hang them on my wall, and kill your father and post the shit on youtube! Maybe then we are halfway close a settlement.

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Why did the boy fall of the swing? He had no arms or legs

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Terminator XXXIVXXX Regensisysydioniosis. Watch as the terminators return in this year`s summer blockbuster, they return to a time before the birth of Connors grandfather and manage to destroy the world, then the only decision left is for humanity in another timeline to travel back as the terminators are destroyed, but they travel back again so that! But that wont happen before Terminator: Los Pollos Hermanos.

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Two men meet at an office. One man says "why the long face?" Then other man says "I just had plastic surgery."

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If you're happy and you know it get a life

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Why did the whale cross the road? He was being chased by the Japanese.

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PENIS that is all

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Which is better; having a billion dollars or a trillion dollars? Trick Question, you aren't that rich.

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why did the man choke at the lunch table. Police there is a banana attacking me what should I do?

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what's funny about cancer. nothing it is a serious life threating disease with no cure.

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Whats worse than getting a B+ in Biology? Getting raped by a scorpion.

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Just friends, they too pretend to be you and copy the way you write and express yourself, I told them to stop though, Azure threatened someone here a cultist of sorts I think, that does not exactly put us in a better light with the people that where getting our messages, and yes they are coded, I sincerely had no idea though,

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Did you hear about the man hear about the man who lost an arm and a leg in a car accident? He's alright now.

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Why did the cookie go to the doctors? It didn't because cookies are Inanimate and are incapable of mobility

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How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One to drop it and die of gas poisoning.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are stupid. It most likely starved to death when it got stuck in a hole.

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Q. Why did the child's mother tell him to clean his room? A. Because his room was messy.

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So a guy gets drunk and walks into a gay bar by accident He then yells I LOVE PENIS!!!!! everyone yells oh yeaaaaaaaaaa

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How do you get children to behave? Chop them up.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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