Why did 3 kids mom's die last year? Because they were depressed and committed suicide.

What's similar about a fish and an eagle? They can both fly, except for the fish.

How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two but I don't know how they got in there.

Why was the kid crying Cuz there was a frog stapled to his head

 

What do you call a black woman that's blind and has 1 leg? Handicapped

Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I am a dog.

How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

Roses are red, Violets are glorious, Don't try to surprise Oscar Pistorius!

whats better than 1,000,000 dollars? 1,000,001 dollars

How does a Welshman take a shit? Like anyone other human being does.

Whats worse than a truck full of dead babies? A live baby trying to eat his way out.

What is Rebecca Blacks favorite resurant? T.G.I Fridays...

Why did the man buy his wife expensive flowers? It was their anniversary and he is a faithful husband.

What do you call a sober man driving a car? a designated driver

Whats worse than a baby stapled to a tree? Holocaust

what happened when the shoe turned into a shoe.......... nothing, it was a raisin

what do you call an albino brown bear a polar bear

Why did the chicken cross the road? Orange ya glad i didn't say banana

A deaf lion tried to kill a zebra. It succeeded.

What do you do to a woman who has a black eye? Punch her in the other eye so that they match.

what is a present you would give a werewolves? I said... OBAMA!!! tee hee

Guy walks into a bar. He orders a drink called "Vampire poison". The bartender gives him the drink. The man drinks it and dies. No he was not a vampire, he was just a man with a history of heart failures.

Two muffins are sitting in an oven.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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