hey hey apple

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What does the lifeguard do on his free time? Ejaculate.

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A plane crashed. The pilot was some sort of food, like a loaf of bread or a salad. Neither of which can fly a plane or do much of anything-- like get a plane to move in the first place, let alone take off.

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I put the word **** in a post. Anti Joke starred it and the joke didn't make sense anymore.

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Ask me if I want an orange. Do you want an orange? No.

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Why is the black man in the ghetto? He is a cop and is trying to solve a murder that was committed a couple days ago.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to try and stop the rapist from sodomizing his young child but his atempts were futile as the rapist shot him and used his blood as lubricant when he skull-raped his dying wife

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whats worse than getting hit whit a baseball? getting hit by a train

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Why did Hitler kill six million Jews? Why not?

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What did Kony say to the children right before he took them Come with me you f******* n*****

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a gay guy is in a club, from across the room he sees another attractive man with now shirt and he gets an erection.

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A horse walks into a bar. The owner promptly calls a local farmer to let him know that his horse has escaped again.

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whats the difference between the same pair of shoes? one shoe is for the left an one if for the right

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Why did little Tommy eat an apple? Because he was on a diet

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A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it!

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Three Lawyers are walking, one falls down, gets up and continues walking

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Why did Justin Beiber cut his hair It had grown to long

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What's the difference between the Hulk and the Thing? One's green.

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who lives a pineapple under the sea? a proper spazztwat.

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How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, others don't

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How do you get your dog to stop peeing on the floor? SHOOT IT!!!

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What did the flower say to the flowerpot? Nice weather we're having

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops