Why was the mouse flying? Because an Owl picked it up, carried it to a tree and ate it.

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What did the homeless guy do when he found a quarter? He picked it up

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A man who is down on his luck was told that when one door closes a window opens. So he jumped out.

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A black man, a Jewish man, and a gay man walk into a bar. They are all good friends who want to enjoy drinks together.

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Magic Johnson has AIDS

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So I showed my friend my blind dog. He said, "Wow I've never seen a blind dog before!" I said, "they havnt seen you either."

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why did the pile of rocks cross the road? they were stuffed down the chickens throat

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Why did the black man buy a watermelon? Because it tastes good.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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Knock knock. Who's there? Get in the van, or I'll kill you.

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What did the boy with no arms get for christmas? Prosthetic arms.

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Q: What do you get when you cross and owl with a bungie cord? A: My ass

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What looks like dirt, smells like dirt, but isn't dirt? Fake dirt!!

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What is black and beats up white people? a cop you racist!

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Warenth Gibson. Warenth Gibson who? Warenth Gibson. What part of that don't you get?

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Today, I had intercourse with a teddy bear

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How do you get a one-armed clown out of a tree? Hit it in the face with an axe.

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Q - Want to hear a joke? A - Me Too.

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Why did the black man fall asleep? because he was tired.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't make for a very good accountant.

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knock knock. who's there? Ida Ida who? Idanno, don't ask me.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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Knock Knock, Get the f*ck off my porch

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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