why did obama become president? people voted 4 him.

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what do you call a black man in a police car? A police officer

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robin has a boy friend its the green lantern

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How do you keep your dog warm? Put antifreeze in its water dish.

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It's funny, because she's twice his size!

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What is the secret to losing weight? Limb Amputation.

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How do you know that your at a gay barbecue? Because, the hot dogs taste like shit!

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Why can't Sally ride her bike? Because Sally is eight months old and doesn't even understand what a bike is.

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What did the ghost say to the bee? BOOBEE

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A jew, a black man, an Irishman, a Scotsman, an Englishman, an American, and a muslim walk into a bar. They discuss their racial, political and religious opinions and walk away after a pleasant evening.

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What has two arms, and two legs but cant walk? A Cripple

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A: Knock Knock! B: Whos there? A: Its the f**king cops we have you surrounded.

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Yo Mama is so fat She wears XL clothes.

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Your Momma's so ugly that if she got plastic surgery she would probably look better

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What do you get when you mix life and cyanide? Death.

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Scenario: 2 people are in a desert. There is only 1 bottle of water left to drink. Who drinks it? Neither of them, they drink the gallon bottle of gatorade instead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, in fact, the "road" in this joke symbolizes the Mexican/American border. The chicken's real name is Esteban Jimenez and he crossed the "road" to reach his family on the other side so he can start his life over. In addition to this, Esteban's real dream was to establish a 401k and possibly go to law school so he could begin his own law firm.

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What did the black guy get on his SAT's. Barbecue sauce

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How come Hellen Keller couldn't drive? Because she was blind and deaf, therefore incapable of performing such a task.

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Diana and victoria

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree there was no monkey

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What do you call a prostitute with no arms and legs? Unfortunate, as they've probably have many misfortunes in life.

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Whats massive, long, hard, cold, and is blue? A penis in an ice cube.

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A man is having dinner with his family at a restaurant. While eating his food, the father tells the waiter,"This food is delicious! My complements to the Chef." When the waiter comes back to the kitchen he says "You are a very handsome man."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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