A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful business man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

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Have you heard any anti-jokes? ... Are you Jewish by chance?

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Why was the little Asian boy crying at the county fair? He had just watched his entire family get brutally crushed beneath the weight of the old ferris wheel as they went to get on. Never would he forget the painful screams of his mother as her blood splashed onto his white t-shirt. Never would he forget the police car ride to the foster home when it all sank in that they were truly gone. And never would he forget the abuse his new parents would inflict on him daily. But what would forever torment him most were those screams. Those persistent screams that woke him in the night until the day he died many, many years later.

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Q: what's white on the top and black on the bottom? A: Society

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A black man is setting up contingency measures of protection in his personal place of residence when all of a sudden, several warning alarms sound and a few specialized people with red "combating" devices who were alerted by the blatant scenerio unfolding before them were moving quickly in order to match previously stipulated criteria of value. The black man and his family were partaking in a monthly fire drill unfolding in their own house since they were extremely responsible, law-abiding citizens of the city they were located in that required various kinds ofl saftey precautions to be taken so to mitigate the serious chance that people might be hurt by preventable, residential distasters.

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Why is McDonalds bad for you? Because their is so much fat in all its products, and contains many calories.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a serial rapist.

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21

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Why did the 60 y/o man take erectile dysfunction pills? His doctor prescribed them.

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Intercom:ALERT! THERES AND EXTREIMEST IS THE SCHOOL! Little kid: Sir, can I borrow that towel on your head? BOOOOOOM!

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Q: My hands are queefing vaginas A: Milk isn't wearing underwears

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what did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Cancer what did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that long.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? "Dwane!" I don't know any Dwane. Perhaps you have the wrong address. "Oh. Sorry to have bothered you!"

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what do you call a child with bruises on his face? Child protective services.

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Yo mamma is so old that she lives in a retirement home for the aged, and will most likely die there in several years.

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If you share rice between 30 Africans what do they each have? Aids.

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Why was the white man's girlfriend a whore? Because she engaged in sexual relations with a multitude of other men.

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What do you call it when a plane crashes into a school? A terrible accident.

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Why do black people have a bad reputation? Because they do bad things.

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? He has retinopathy of prematurity and was born blind.

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Roses are red violets are blue Timmy what are doing with that gun?! Bang....

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Roses are red. Violets are grey. People hate me. Mongoose.

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What has two legs and two arms? A Human

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I like my women like i like my coffee... with big titis

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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