What happens when a right turn is finally made in NASCAR? The driver has successfully changed his tires and has been refueled, now he is pulling out of pit lane.

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How does Michael J. Fox mix his paint? He uses the paint mixing stick that is provided, for free, by most reputable hardware stores.

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Why did the old man miss the Alzheimer's Day walk? Because he died in his sleep.

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Why did the girl drop her vannlia ice cream? Vannlia Ice punched her for being cool as ice.

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whats funnier then a children's hospital..... it catching on fire.

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Q: There was a train wreck in the middle of nowhere, every one died, no one saw the train wreck, so how did the story about the wreck get out? A:Many philosophers believe that the universe is a figment of its own imagination. Therefore, if "the universe" decided that it wanted the story to get out, it could have just made it so since it is its own imagination.

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What happens when you drop a glass of milk? It hits the ground and breaks, depending on what material the glass is made of, acrylic glass or plastic, and the softness of the floor you drop it on,

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You mama's so fat, that the doctor suggested that she go on a diet.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Why cant your mom breathe She chockin on my D**K

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What did the Frog say to the other Frog? Nothing they can't speak

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you know your just like my pinkie toe........eventually i am going to bang you on a table

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A dyslexic walks into church and asks the priest. "Father is there a dog."

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Why did the man cry? Because his mom died in a terrible car accident.

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Y u do dis?

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His face was drawn, but the curtains were real.

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An asian man and a black man were having a conversation. The asian man sneezed. The black man got SARS and he died shortly after.

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Why is the average lifespan of Black men in the U.S. only about 52? Hundreds of years of oppression and a lack of nutritional, liberal, and vocational education have put them in a position where gathering the resources necessary to live a healthy and safe life are greatly is incredibly difficult.

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What do you call a white guy sitting on a bench? The NBA.

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CAVE JOHNSON.

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Your mother is so old, she could easily be considered a senior citizen.

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A bar walks into a man

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your mom is so nasty that when she took a shower and acquired general etiquette, she became possibly more respectable

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Why did the fat guy survive the the plane crash? He was late to get up due to a malfunctioning alarm clock and so missed his flight, sparing him of the tragic outcome the other passengers suffered. To this day he still thinks about how a completely random occurrence saved his life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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