How do you kill a blind man, run over him in slow motion

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America's Got Talent WIN! Britian's Got Talent WIN! Mexico's Got Talent WTF!

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whats worse than having ice cream and not eating it? Being lactose intolerant

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How do you make an elephant float? Who cares?

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Why did god make asians? I dont know. Yah, me niether

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Q: What is harder than cleaning off baby bloodstains off a wall? A: Cleaning multiple baby blood stains off a wall.

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Your mamas so old that she sat next to Jesus in kindergarten?

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What's big, black, and girls love to ride on? A horse

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One day a priest walked into a prison to bring lost souls to the Lord.....Not his best idea.

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What did Elmer Fudd say when Bugs Bunny got away again? "Oh, dat dawn wabbit, I'ww get it some day".

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-Knock-knock. -Who's there? -Interrupting Doctor. -Interrup.. -You have cancer.

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What did Osama bin Laden say to Jesus? Nothing. He's in hell.

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her with a knife.

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Q: why did the boy walk into the woods alone? A: nobody knows he hasn't come out yet

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Hey Babies, The holocaust called, they want their screams back

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roses are red violets are blue just telling you in case you didnt know

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know I'm not a bird physcologist

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Who ya gonna call? ... Whoever you need to talk to at the current time.

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Why did the lightbulb cross the road? It must have had an external force acting upon it. Lightbulbs are inanimate objects and cannot make decisions or move voluntarily. Someone must have thrown it. It broke. Someone should clean it up.

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Q:Whats yellow and white and sits at the bottom of a pool? A: A baby with slashed floaties Q:Whats red and gory and sits at the top of a pool? A: Floaties with a slahed baby

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Why did the male propagate the female? Because he was drugged. Slyly, this foxy female had slipped the male the date rape drug and a dangerous amount of viagra. During intercourse, the male ripped a gaping hole in the female's stomach and killed her. He woke up confused inside a dead stinking corpse.

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A nun, a jew, and a black walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, a joke?"

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A wife asks her husband to treat her like she's special. So he tells her, "Gooooooooooo... Maaaaaaaaaaaaake... Meeeeeeee.... Aaaaaa.... Saaaaaaaandwitch

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Two Drunks walk out of a bar. They look down an alley and see a dog licking his balls. The first drunk says" Man, I wish I could do that." The second guy replies " Well you better pet him first."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops