What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

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Why did the depressed man jump off the bridge? Because bungee jumping is a great activity to relieve stress.

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Why was the baseball player happy? He got married.

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a man walks into a bar, it hurt.

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727-8088-954 Call Me. Say your name is Nick whether or not your a guy or a girl.

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What happens when a black person brakes his neck? He gets a neck brace just like anyone else.

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What do you call a blond reading a book? A blond reading a book.

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Ask me if I like pie. Do you like pie? OF COURSE!!!!!

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Whats worse than getting a parking ticket? The Bubonic Plague

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Whats the difference between chad woldert and justin beiber? Nothing

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What do you call a dog with no legs? A dog.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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whats big and green, andif it falls from a tree , it can kill you? a golfcourse

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What's long, hard and full of seamen? A submarine.

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What do you give hobos? Febreeze

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What's the reason my dog died? I ate him.

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What did the widow get for mother's day? A miscarriage

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If the best things in life are free, whats the hardest things in life? Death.

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How many blondes does it take to skrew in a lightbulb? Usually just one.

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what is green an invisible? this cabbage

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Math: "If I have 5 bottles in one hand and 4 in the other, what do I have?" Answer: "An unreasonable amount of bottles to hold in two hands."

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Knock Knock Who's There Seventeen Thirty Eight I'm like hey what's up hello Seen yo pretty ass soon as you came in that door I just wanna chill, got a sack for us to roll Married to the money, introduced her to my stove Showed her how to whip it, now she remixin' for low She my trap queen, let her hit the bando We be countin' up, watch how far them bands go We just set a goal, talkin' matchin' Lambos Got 56 a gram, prob' a 100 grams though Man, I swear I love her how she work the damn pole Hit the strip club, we be letting bands go Everybody hating, we just call them fans though In love with the money, I ain't never letting go And I get high with my baby (baby) I just left the mall, I'm getting fly with my baby, yeah

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A twelve year old play Minecraft. He never made any friends. What did you expect?

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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