Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: b/c it was dead. Q: Why did the second monkey fall out if the tree? A: b/c it was stapled to the first one. Q: Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A: b/c he thought it was a game. Q: Why did the toaster fall out of the tree? A: The branch snapped. Q: Why did the little girl fall off of her bike? A: She was hit by three monkeys and a toaster :( MAB99

A man on an airplane is extremely frustrated by a small, screaming child. He puts on his headphones and listens to music.

Why don't women drive more? Because statistically the man offers to drive more frequently

Theres this black guy who goes to a gun shop and buys a .45 and then goes to get a permit and uses it responsibly....

A man had come into a bar. No wait, it was a horse. A man had come into a horse.

How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

Urban ghettos

Why did Elliot Spitzer cross the road? To go have sex with a hooker.

Roses are der Violets are eulb I am dyslexic

How do you kill a blind man, run over him in slow motion

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A worm in your intestinal tract.

A dog walks into a bar. The owner got a fake service dog identification and everyone really enjoyed it.

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for winter and now I am dead."

A man walks into a bar, he says ouch.

Why wasn't Steve paying attention in class? Because he was dead.

What's red and smells like blue paint? red paint

Why did the sky turn gray? Yes because she thought it meant a quarterback.

what did the kid with no legs gat for her birthday? A soccer ball! I feel bad for this young girl.

Vote this down and get DOXED

A- Knock knock. B- Who's there? A- The interrupting doctor. B- The interrupt- A- You have cancer.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. So is my eye. I get abused.

Q) What did the cowboy say to the astronaut? A) Howdy.

A little boy was taken away in a black van with the promises of candy and a puppy of his very own. What he received? That fore mentioned, and more. The more? Ass rape

why couldnt james zatts swim? he was half black

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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