Why don't vampires like garlic? Every vampires was raped by a garlic salesman.

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are u black unlucky

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You know what sucks ? A vacuum.

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What's more dangerous, a big rock or a small one? It doesn't matter. You can blame my mom for having me.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Jane from next door. Hi Jane how can I help you? Just wondering if my sister could use the spare spot on your drive tomorrow afternoon around 3pm? She is coming round for tea. I'm very sorry but my wife is due back around that time. Not a problem, thanks anyway. Have a great day. Bye Jane, see you soon, sorry again.

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Knock Knock I'm sorry but the new don't ask don't tell laws require me to not answer but do feel free to come in for some tea.

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How do you get a blonde with one hand out of a tree? Grab a ladder and carry her down.

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What's red, white, and blue? light purple

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is dead. Dead people can't drive.

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What do you call a man with a diploma? A high school graduate.

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A duck walks into a doctor's office. Quack.

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Wizard: If you could get any one thing in the world, what would it be son? Son: Another father that grants more wishes.

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Women drivers...

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What is better than a dead baby nailed to a tree? A dead baby nailed to 10 Trees.

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What's the difference between a car tyre and 365 used condoms? One is a Goodyear. The others a fucking great year!!! San2

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face!

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There is an elephant, a zebra, a lion, and a black man. The black man is enjoying his visit to the zoo.

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wake n shake = wake up and masterbate to a picture of drew e mom o.O

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What's worse than depression? Having depression and killing yourself

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adam hodgson !

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mark lawson likes boys

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What do you call a person who kills a black? A black man

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Why are birds purple? because it fits the sky why are bats purple? bats aren't purple

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What does the fox say? "It's called a hustle, sweetheart."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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