What do you do when life gives you Oranges? You make lemonade and life wonders how you did it

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Why did the little boy die? He had cancer.

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flavin's head

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What did the sheep say to the Commonwealth Committee on September 11 2001? Baabaaabaaaahhh

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Q:What's red and crawls up your leg? A: A homesick abortion

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kids make accidents in the backseat of your car but u and your wife made an accident in the backseat and thats how you got that rottten troll that makes accidents in the car!!

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What do an elephant and a can of soup have in common? Neither one can ride a bicycle.

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Whats better than Anti-jokes? Mtiscape.com

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Katy Perry

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How does Hitler tie his shoes? With little Nazis.

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Rick Santorum 2012

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? I throw a refrigerator at him.

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How do you get a Hooker Wet? Dump her in a River.

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What's better than winning the Paralympics? Having legs.

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Q: why did the train not make it to the station? A: it crashed and killed everybody on board.

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Why was Dr Who unable to travel back in time using the TARDIS? Because it's just a television prop. It isn't a real time machine.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Your mother is so fat that when she went to get weighed she was diagnosed as clinically obese and later broke down into tears.

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your so vein that doctors find you really helpful when giving you injections

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What's harder than breaking up with your girlfriend? A stone.

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What's Green and flies? Super Grapes cousin Super Grape

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If at first you don’t succeed, you clearly weren’t the right person for the job. We’re sorry, but we’re going to have to let you go; please collect your belongings and vacate the premises immediately.

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How do you confuse a conspiracy theorist? Tell them the government is not real.

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what has hair and can fly? a human.. i lied about the flying.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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