Why did the chicken cross the road? To reach his desired destination.

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if you have hair on the palm of your hand you might want to get that checked out

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What did Batman and Robin say when they were going to the Batmobile? To the Batmobile

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What do you find in a pile of dead babies? ************************************************ A dead baby.

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dude... what would you do if i punched you in the face? i would pee on you

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What do you get when a white person and a black person make a baby? A possible high functioning member of society.

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I thought it was the WHITE house. C'mon Obama. C'mon

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Once there was a girl named Andrea

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Q: Why did Grandma fall down the stairs? A: Because she had a brain hammerage

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Ask me If I am an orange? Are you and Orange? No

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Q: Where's the cheese? Who ate the cheese? A: How do you know it's been eaten because it's gone? Are you making the assumption that food that has disappeared was eaten because that is usually how food disappears? I am filing a lawsuit against you for your malevolent foodism.

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penis?

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Q: What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas. A: A bicycle.

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What starts with D and ends with ICK? Drumstick.

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

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there once was a frog with no leggs

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roses are red,violets are blue,faces like yours belong in a zoo,but don't worry i'll be there to,not in a cage but laughing at you!

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What worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an apple and finding 2 worms

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, as I wasn't there, and frankly I wonder why a chicken was anywhere near a road anyway

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Why was the 3 year old high He was flying

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Person 1:"Knock Knock" Person 2: Whos there.... Wait why did you literally say the words "Knock Knock" Person 1: I have no idea

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what has 52 teeth and holds back a monster? my zipper

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Q. If you're paddling up river and you lose three tires, how many pancakes does it take to cover a doghouse? A. Purple because ice cream has no bones.

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Man, It's so hot in here that the horses name is friday.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops