What's Kanye West's main goal in life? To dash the hopes and dreams of Taylor Swift on national television.

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Alcoholic walks into a bar and then walks out because he promised his children and wife that he would straight out his life.

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What did Iran say to Israel? ALLLLAHH

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Roses are lamp, Violets are squirrel, I have ADHD, LET'S DANCE!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Cement is grey, Shoes are myriad colors, but usually white, black, or brown, depending on their use, And I love you.

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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Why haven't any women go to the moon? Cause it still doesn't need cleaning.

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Q: Why couldnt the kid feel his legs A: He had no arms

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why did the chicken cross the road? becasue he wanted to. also he didnt want to be involved in the holocost

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what kind of road kill is green and smells like cookies?

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Whats the difference between a field of corn and a dead body? The field of corn wasn't killed by severe blood loss and hemorrhaging after it was stabbed in the back, stomach and abdomen 27 times in 1987, where the escaped convicted serial killer buried it beside a river in Northern Dakota.

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Yo mama is so ugly that the devil warships her.

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hashtags suck balls

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Whats the most fun thing you can do with hangers and a vaccum cleaner? -abort babies

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Are you ready kids "Aye Aye Captain" I Can't hear you "AYE AYE CAPTAIN" Ohh... Who lives in a pineapple under the sea "Spongebob squarepants" Absorbant and yellow and porous is he "Spongebob Squarepants" If nautical nonsense be something you wish "Spongebob Squarepants" Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish "Spongebob Squarepants" READY Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!

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Vancouver Canucks Hater: What time is? Another Vancouver Canucks Hater: 6 past Luongo

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Roses are red violets are blue I can't rhyme fridge

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Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a truck? No.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Chinese. What? Knock Knock.

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Apparently I'm an unfit father, cuz all I know is dope and all I got is 30 dollas

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your mom is so ugly, when she throws a boomerang it doesn't come back

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Why did the little boy stick a fork in the electrical socket? Because he wanted to escape his abusive stepfather

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knock knock. "who's there?" dick. "dick who?" dick ferns.

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How many electricians does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops