"Ask me if I'm a tree," "Are you a tree?" "No."

How do you punish Helen Keller? Send her to her room until she becomes civil enough to explain what was causing her misbehavior.

whats helen kellers favorite activity fingering herself

Twelve billion Nero, you puppy dog you hot blooded latino man. Why cant I control it myself?

What is yellow and white and goes 150 miles down a railroad track? a duck.

2 brothers were arguing, both had anger problems to the point where one started war with the other. Boy1: I HATE YOU Boy2: MOM HATES YOU Boy1: ....Wait why? Boy2: YOU WERE AN ACCIDENT SHE TRIED TO SELL YOU TO A MEXICAN AND HE SAID THAT THING WAY TOO DAM UGLEH ITD BURN THE FACES OFF MY COWS.

what happens when you piss on a dead monkey nothing you just lose the urge to pee O.o

When geese fly in the "V" shape, why is one side longer than the other? There are more geese on that side.

Ronan Parke, making Justin Bieber look straight since 2009

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Well, it all depends on the size of the bathtub.

What kind of toy do you give to a dead baby? A death rattle.

Roses are red violets are blue tulips are purple/pink

A British man walks into a dentist's office.

Why did the chicken cross the road? You reading another one of these again?

What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels.

ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ now I know my ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ no I know my ABC etc:

LOL we are spamming this site too much!

Q. What do you call a child with no friends or family A. Adopted

Q: Why did the chicken cross the side of the road? A: To get to the other vagina

A rabbi and priest both go into a bar... and they each had a responsible number of drinks before walking home.

what do you call a ginger......... billy and mickee.......

Roses are red Violets are blue What about green? That seems mean...

Im Harold Camping.... and i enjoy scaring the shit out of you

Why did the man have a heart attack? Because he suffered from high cholesterol and cardiovascular disease.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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