If 2 trains are going 60 mph, their going in opposite directions towards each other, they are slowing down 1 mile per hour per 10 miles and they are 100 miles away, would you rather have Coke or Pepsi?

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Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

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What you reading? reading?

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A blonde girl gets in a bad car accident . A man stops on the side of the road to help her . She is panicking The man gets out a piece of chalk and draw a small circle. He says "Do not step out of this circle" The man smashes her car with a baseball bat She giggles He rolls her car down the hill, She laughs Her car is on fire , She is cracking up He yells " WHAT IS SO FUNNY " She says , "I stepped out of the circle three times when you weren't looking"

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Q. What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? A. Robin, get in the car.

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What do you get when you hit a deer? A dead deer, which you should probably take home to eat - wouldn't want it to go to waste.

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I killed someone today. :D

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? The same number it would take people with any other hair color.

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An Indian child is born with three arms. After being ridiculed his whole life he kills himself at age 19.

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Why are rich people so rich? they're not poor.

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The first few weeks of joining weight-watchers...you're just finding your feet.

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Why did the mexican order a bean burrito? Because thats his favorite

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This anti-joke below is hilarious.

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What was the blind man doing before he was strangled? He was breathing.

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what did the black man eat for dinner? whatever his wife makes for him to eat

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Why was the boy dad? Because he was taken advantage of by an older woman during ovulation and impregnated her.

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Where's Waldo? It is impractical to search for him because he's just going to get lost on another page once you find him. You assume he was murdered and get on with your life.

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How are trees and friends alike? They are both subject to fall when struck with an axe.

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Eats shoots and leaves Pandas. If you can't figure this out then you're probably 12

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Why are black people afraid of chainsaws. Because they have razor sharp edges and can slice through flesh very easily, posing a potential threat if possessed by a violent person.

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Why was the black man pulled over? Racism still lingers in today's society.

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Ask me If I'am a tree are u a tree? no.....

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How do you get money out of a Jew? You convince him your cause is worthwhile.

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What did the girl with two broken legs give her parents for Christmas? Medical bills.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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