What do you do when a blond ask you a question? Answer politely and thank her for her wonderful question.

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Please spell dyslexia.

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Q: what is man without a beard A:not a man

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What is the square root of 69? 8.306623863

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Person 1: Knock Knock Person 2: ...... Person 1: Knock Knock Person 2: ...... Person 1: Knock Knock Person 2: ...... Person 1 leaves because no one is answering the door

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Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock WHAT THE F*** DO YOU WANT?!?!?!?! Oh, well then nevermind

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whats worse then biting into a worm and finding an apple??? getting raped up the butt by a giant tiger!

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Two cows were on a field, one cow say "moo", the other... didn't say anything because it wasn't a cow

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What do you call a guy so fat that he can't fit in a bath tub? A guy so fat that he can't fit in a bath tub.

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An ordinary man, much like your friend Brad from that one place where you used to hang out, was walking along one night, much like that night last week, and saw a star. He then wished upon that star...and kept walking.

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My mom caught me masturbating.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Faces like yours being in a zoo But don't worry I'll be there too Behind the bars, laughing at you

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Why did the black man swim across the lake? He didnt. He drowned

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What do you call a piece grass just mowed. A black person.

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What has two thumbs and is very pale? A dead baby.

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What is underneath Chuck Norris' Beard? His Chin

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A recently engaged couple are having sex. The man finishes in just under 3 minutes as usual. The woman then says "I love you" because they've been together for over 2 years and they care for each other very deeply.

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One day, on a train. 30 white, violently, racist people where crowding a black man minding his own business. An asian person walked through and was kicked, stabbed and stomped on until he died.

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You best friend has a bladder disease. You ask him how he got it. He says " I was watching the superbowl and had to go, but I didn't want to miss the commercials. So it was either watching the game and getting a bladder disease that would end up killing me or going to the bathroom . Now you know where i went wrong."

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What is smelly and sticky A poo

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your mom is so blind she cant read.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? a genetically disfigured fish please stop pollution.

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roses are red, vilots are blue wan't you in my bed if you know what i mean ;)

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What did one mail box say to the other? NOTING! In-animate objects cannot speak...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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