Okay, this is a real joke: A guy slips on a banana and falls down in the most funny way ever, so a girl nearby starts laughing when she suddenly realizes the guy is bleeding profoundly, so she runs over to help, but it turns out the blood was just ketchup so... Just then they both got run over and killed by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why was it raining lobsters? Because they ran out of men. Why did the basketball player miss the net? Because he was hit by a lobster

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why do you want to know? And what did the censor get? Okay okay you are not boring nor stale nor anything, please increase the effect of this thing, its not working very well when I try to.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How do you confuse a blonde? The same way you confuse a brunette or redhead, hair color has nothing to do with an individual's intelligence.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

nathan your cats dead now...well hopefully

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A man walks into a bar. Realizing he forgot his ID, he leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A vampire sees a werewolf at a bar, aware of the upcoming brawl between them two, the bartender shoots them both in the head but it's okay because neither of them exist.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the woman put super glue on her sun glasses? Because she stepped on them and they broke.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

If you have 12 apples and I have 12 ice cubes how many pancakes fit on a roof? Purple because aliens don't wear hats.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Ready for something funny? nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's more sad then a dumpster full of dead babies? The live one at the bottom.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q. What is the worlds biggest lie A. I have read and agree to the terms of service ?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Cliterus

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the German girl say to me? entschuldigen Sie (excuse me)

thumb_up thumb_down -7

toby limbers is gonna follow in his uncles footsteps, the gay ones

thumb_up thumb_down -7

why did the supermodel have sex with the janitor? she loved him. and he was brad pitt.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's worse than speaking to a Russian bear? Gettting mauled and eaten by one.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Every Good Boy Deserves Fibromyalgia

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the man laugh as he sat in the electric chair? He was being tickled by the guard.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How do you kill Justin Beiber? By stabbing him 38 times in the chest.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did Little Tommy get for chirstmas? An explanation that Santa is a lie.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the bartender say to the upset horse? GET OUT OF MY BAR!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops