A black man has just died on your porch. What do you do? Immediately call for medical assistance and perform CPR.

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Why did the little girl cry? Her mom died

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What's the difference between a grape and a duck? They're both purple, apart from the duck.

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A Jew, A black, and a Hispanic jump off a building. Who hits the ground first? Who cares.

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How do you get the pesky neighborhood kids off your front lawn? Molest them.

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What is the least funny thing in the world? This joke.

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There are only three kinds of math teachers: teachers that can count and teachers that can't count

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Where did the AIDS victim go on vacation? To the hospital.

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

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What would George Washington do if he was able to talk to all of America? Ask them to dig him up.

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Why did the hipster burn his mouth on a piece of pizza? Because the pizza was on fire.

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whats the difference between a black man and a cat? you dont run from a cat

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours Stolen propety....

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What do you call a guy with aids? Your dad

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Why did the guy get glasses? So he could get his dick into the vagina.

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once i was a dog and u were a flower........... i raised my leg and gave u a shower :)

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did you see stevie wonder's new guitar no neither did he

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What's clear, glass-like, and makes your brain feel like it's exploding just by smelling it? Crystal Meth

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How do you kill a domb blond? Shoot her in the head.

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Once upon a time there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly, everyone died. The end.

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whats the sad part of 4 negroes driving off a cliff? the car couldve fit 5

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Did you hear about the kid from Oklahoma? Yeah, he died.

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What do you call a fish with no eye? Blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops