My grandfather slipped on a banana peel. I helped him up.

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What did the father say to his child Christmas morning? you're adopted

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A. Why did the boy cross the road? B. Why? A. I don't know! That's why I'm asking you.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. It is a coincidence that none of them have the same hair colour.

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How did the blonde girl get pregnant? Sperm enters their vagina and fertilizes an egg cell causing a child to be conceived.

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how do you make a plumber cry? you pull its pants up

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What happened to the fat japanese guy? His house was destroyed by the earthquake.

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Q. What do you do when you cross an elephant, and a soccer ball. A. That would never happen.

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How can you tell the difference between Brooke Colbert or any other girl Jesse has been with? It's easy, Brooke the only one Jesses ever been with. They even share the same bra size.

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You've got more chins than a Chinese... Girl with a lot of chins, because she's so fat

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My captcha thing says "hulk smash" lol bahahahahahahaha, k

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What's black and blue and hates sex? A rape victim.

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Your ancestors called. They want their glasses back!

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Jennifer Kim... having a boyfriend!

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Q: What do you get when you mix root beer with a cloud? A: Nothing, you idiot.

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Whats green and can kill you when it falls from a tree? a pool table

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What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? My ass

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What happens when a bunch of animals break into your house... they eat you.

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A drum and a cymbal fall off a cliff...

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Patient: Doctor, doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains! Doctor: That's because you are. Patient: Wow, I need to lay off the mushrooms.

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A black man a mexican and a caucasian were walking together. The black man and the mexican walked into a bar. The caucasian ducked. Not because his race makes him smarter in anyway, but because his friends shouted out a warning to him. All three then proceeded to the nearest pub.

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A chronic hemophilliac walks into a bar. He cuts himself and bleeds to death.

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His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

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What's the difference between a 7 year old boy and a 50 year old man? Hair.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops