Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper... used to clean up a crime scene.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Chuck Norris walks into a bar, the bartender says ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Yo Mama just died.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A student exclaimed "This test is a piece of cake!" He ate it.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

what did hellen keller name her dog? answer: unnumnumnum

thumb_up thumb_down -19

why did the asian wearing a sombrero buy orange juice at 2am? because hes trying to stay sober and do away with alcohol for good because its ruining his family and he wants to be a good father and husband.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

why was the baby crying? cause his abusive father broke his arm.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What is the difference between a calendar and you? A calendar has dates!!

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did the father say to his child Christmas morning? you're adopted

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Miley Cyrus Walked into a fence and fainted.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I got a baseball bat can i talk to you ?

thumb_up thumb_down -19

I hate it when you can't tell whether a person is male or female.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why couldnt the man stop the car rolling down the hill? Because he had no legs.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did the gym coach tell his student? Come on! You can do it! Push harder!

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A racist man walks into an all black church. He has no problem with the people there as he is a black man who hates caucasion people.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's black, blue, red, green, white, purple, orange, yellow, etc.? Last I checked, a bunch of colors

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: A bleeding penguin.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why can't the toucann fly anymore? Because they're extinct

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A Jewish man and a blonde were in a DIY store, the man buys a box of screws. The woman gets a phone call to find out her son is late for tennis training. She then hangs up the phone and leaves the DIY store with great hast.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the paraplegic roll his wheelchair up a steep hill? Because he's crippled.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the little girl cry in school? Because she remembered her parents were both in prison. She is in a state run foster academy.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did Bob the Builder die? He had cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

why did the baby die ? he fell down the stairs

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops