Why did they bury the fireman on the east side of the green grassy hill, to the left of the old well, underneath the huge apple tree? Because he was dead.

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A black, jew, mexican, and american are on the boat. The boat begins to sink. As an idea, they all throw stuff off the boat to try to stay afloat. The black throws off cotton, the jew throws off yamakas, and the mexican throws off sombreros. Then, the american throws off the mexican because there are too many in his country. The mexican drowns. The boat still sinks and the american goes to hell while the other go to heaven.

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Why did the black man run out of the shop with items under his jacket? He was shopping for groceries, when his brother texted him, letting him know that his wife had just gone into labour. He then realised that it was a very miserable rainy day outside and he didn't have an umbarella, so he payed for his items, and ran to his car.

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What's orange and fluffy? Orange Fluff

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Why did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Why did the genie not grant the man his 3 wishes? Genies don't exist, only vampires live in lamps.

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An atheist and a priest agree to a public debate. The priest doesn't make much of an attempt to argue because there is a young boy in his podium giving him a handjob.

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(PC) What did the homosexual man say when accidently sat on a stick? Ouch.

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Ask me if I'm a watermelon. Are you a watermelon? No...

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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What's the difference between a horse and a house? 1 letter.

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That's not mine! it's bigger and blacker! ...where have i heard this before?

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What's a good joke? France going to war and winning.

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Why was the cancer ward sad? They just lost a patient who couldn't ward off cancer.

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Roses are red violets are blue I fucked your mom now im about to fuck you to.

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What's smaller then a midget? A baby midget.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

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Two friends sit down at a table for lunch. One, in a very frustrated mood, says to the other, "You know what I don't get?" His friend immediately responds: "Sex."

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Your mom is so fat that she sat on a rock.

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Knock knock Who's there? Nobody Oh, ok

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I like my coffee how I like my women Without a penis

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What's sad about Justin bieber getting thrown off of a cliff Nothing

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What did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware River? "Men, we're crossing the Delaware River."

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How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? several.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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