one time, a fancy business man walked into a bar. but then he figured out that he wasnt supposed to be there. so he politely apologized to the mortician an and he granted him permission to exit the closet.

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Trust me, you are that kind of girl, and no, you are not nerdy, you are open and down to ground, while your beautiful exterior means a lot to me (I am a man, its the way I am), I would never have wanted to talk to you or even less visit you with a pack (make it five packs) of condoms, if you where the awkward Asperger kind of gal, so how old are you, like seriously?

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Why do dyslexic people stink at typing? c k j a h s d i u p q h g n z v m n k b e r t y o f This is why...

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Do you know whats funny? No do you know i was asking a question

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why did the blind kid cross the road... because he was sick of being blind

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What did the elephant say to the naked man? "Cute, cute, but can it pick up peanuts?"

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What's the difference between Chuck Norris and Bigfoot? Nothing. Their both really hairy.

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What's worse than getting a apple and finding a worm in it. Getting hit in the face with a meteorite.

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Have you heard about the Polish princess? There isn't one. The Polish monarchy was abolished in 1918.

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What's long and hard and full of semen? An erect penis at the climax of an orgasm.

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Why couldnt the pirate get into the movies? Because it was rated pg-13 and his parents didnr likw him watching that

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Your momma's so not fat that when a school bus rolled by here house, she just sat there and turned on oprah.

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Q: Why wasn't the baby playing with his blocks? A: Because his face was stapled to the floor

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How do you know you're on a blind date with a black person? If they agree to eat at KFC in Compton (Wyndellberg)

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Knock Knock Knockin on heavens door..

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Knock Knock. Who's there? I don't know, you answer the door.

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How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? Well it depends how many of them can figure out the staircase.

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It is wrong to strip a homeless man of his clothes and chew his face off. Note to self: Explain this to someone before they have taken bath salts.

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why don't asians use this finger (point at pinky)? because it's my finger.

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whats the difference between a jew and a boy scout? - The boy scout comes home from camp.

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Q:a black man walks down the street with alot of light whats happaning he A:is it the parade of light

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why did the chicken cross the road because he wanted to get to chicken to have safe sex

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

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What do a grape and an airplane have in common? They both have wings! except not the grape.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops