What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

A pirate walks into a bar with a wheel on his crotch, and the bartender says, "What's that?" and the pirate says, "A deadly tumor."

Man walks into an apple store. Shortly after he leaves with a fully charged phone.

how many dead babies can fit in a microwave? 3 1/2

A kid walks in to a bar. The bartender asks the boy where his parents are and he replies that he does not know. They call the police who proceed to try to contact the boy's parents. They have gone missing so the boy must go up for adoption. He gets adopted by an abusive family and runs away. Without a family, job, or money, he could not afford a house. He lived alone in a box until he died of starvation.

. HAHAHAHA I have control of you I don't enjoy that picture.

What do men like most of all? Let's not lie, BOOBIES!

What's orange and sounds like a parrot? An orange parrot.

Why did my bed broke? Becaus i had sex with your mom!

Fiona: SHREK! WHERE WERE YOU TONIGHT? Shrek: Out clubbing with the boys. Fiona: What did you do. Shrek: Eat Jews. Borat: iz vedy naaace

how do fit 104 jews in a car? 2 in the front, 2 in the back, and 100 in the ash tray.

Your mam is so fat.

Roses are red Violets are blue I like pussy Because it feels really good when I stick my penis inside her vaginal opening

Teacher: Why didn't you do your homework? Student: My friends told me not to. Teacher: So if your friends tell you to go jump off a bridge, would you do it? Student: Well, it all depends on if I land on a fat kid. Like Chubb. Chubb: Yeah, I know, my eating habit, i-i-its a big problem. -Payden R.

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist.

Q: How do you measure a ruler A: You don't.

What the the newly born male dog get for his first birthday? A loss of two testicles.

What's the Chinese guy's favorite color? Blue.

Once their was an ugly barnacle. He was sooooo ugly that everyone died! The end. :D

what did the homeless man get for christmas hyperthermia

A Fat Kenyan

Why did the man die after getting his picture taken The camera was a gun

Yeah your point? Anyway, so then the brain surgeon goes: I have have cut into thousands of brains, and never seen a single thought.

Why did the cat eat his food? Because he was hungry.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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