A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Mikey : I wan to divorce. Miney :are u funking crazy Mikey : no I'm funking dazy !

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A horse walks into a convenience store. He grabs a pack of gum, pays the man at the counter, and walks out.

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A black man walks into KFC. the whole room..THE GAME.

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what do you call it when justin beiber makes a sex tape with selina gomez? lesbian porn.

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A man walks into a bar, I forget the rest of this joke and your mother's a whore.

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How do you know when a Captcha defect causes you to post the same anti-joke three times? Canteloupe.

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Women. One of the genders a human can be.

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can you touch your toes? no

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roses are red violets are blue does this smell like chloroform

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Q: what did batman say to robin before they got into the car? A: get in the car (:

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How do you confuse a Muslim? - Rub his belly.

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What do you call a bunch of white people walking down a cliff? Avalanche

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Lucy laughed at the joke. Then realised she had gangrene.

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Q-What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? A-Where's my tractor?

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a brunet,a redhead,and a blone were stranded on an island 4 miles away from land. the brunet swam 1 mile and drowned. the redhead swam 2 and drowned. the blond swam 3 miles and decided to swim 3 miles back to the island

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Knock Knock Who's there? (Pause) Who's there? Hello? Bloody kids

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What did one penguin say to the other Nothing, penguins don't talk.

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Whats the difference between Obama and Hitler? One is the President of the United States The other is a fascist dictator that killed millions.

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If a guy has a sex change what is the first thing he would say? Boobies!

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in a car crash an entire family is killed from death until they all die

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Bill gates walked into a store and farted. It stunk up the entire place and the employees were mad. But it was their fault for not having windows.

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How do you get rid of a pile of dead babies? Call 911 so someone will pick them up and take them to the morgue.

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What's the difference between getting hit by a car and being struck by lightning? Impossible to tell, they are 2 entirely different circumstances with limited certainties.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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