a jerk that i knew was in a bar. he was about to drive home. at first i tried to stop him until he was sober. instead he punched me in the face. then i dared him to drive home as fast as possible. he died that night... i texted him all the way...

I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

69

What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Intercourse.

Why does the black man take drugs. Because he is very sick.

what is white and sticky a stick from a birch tree

A man walks into a bar. It hurt.

I once shot an elephant in my pajamas. I suffer from a debilitating sleep disorder.

Why do gay people go to the beach on memorial? idk im not gay

I used to be an adventurer like you, then I took an arrow to the knee and had armor so it deflected off. Then I found out my wife was pregnant.

What's worse than the WNBA? The Cleveland Cavaliers.

Badabing.

hi bye

Roses are red, violets blue, um... that's all i got.

Whats worse than a bee sting? -Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? -The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? -Three bee stings.

get it right up there, says jacob while with danni

roses are brown violets are brown who shit on my garden?

Knock Knock Who's there? Kevin. Kevin who? Kevin Smith. Oh yes, Kevin Smith that lovely boy from just around the corner! Come on in!

whats the difference between the same pair of shoes? one shoe is for the left an one if for the right

How do I want to die? From Chuck Norris killing me, that would be an honor.

chickens, roads, horses, bars,roses, violets, sally, knock, knock, fnord

What's blue and fluffy? Pink fluff holding its breath

You will NEVER guess what just happened!

How do you kill a Jewish person? Like any other person, they are like any other person of any race and religion.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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