What do you call an arab with a beard? How cares what his name is just shoot him!

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So there was a jewish guy, a black guy, and a white guy all sky diving. They all had an amazing time and they all went to a bar later to talk about what they just had experienced.

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How can you treble the value of any Skoda car? Ensure its paintwork, upholstary, floor, lights, wipers, steering wheel, brake, horn, CD player, radio and clutch are clean and/or sound; fill its petrol tank, oil, brake and winscreen wiper fluid reserves; fit a roof rack; include a red triangle, a fire extinguisher, a blanket and a first aid kit in the sale; take out comprehensive insurance and pay a year's road tax and MOT before selling it.

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I also wanted to write a joke but I forgot it so here I am. Minecraft rocks and everyone who says otherwise is a noob

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A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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What's tall, has a really long neck, and eats leaves? My tall vegan neighbor's giraffe

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the Shell Station.

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What is long and painful? It's a sword, get your mind out of the gutter.

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What do you call a dear with no eyes? no eyed dear what do you call a dear with no head? dead!

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What do you call postman pat without a job? Pat.

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A black child gives away his piece of fried chicken. He is allergic, and eats some watermelon instead.

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I dream of a world where chickens can cross the road and not have their motives questioned.

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What's worse than finding the Holocaust in your apple? Nothing

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I bought a pound of gold for my new gold ring, later that day I lost it

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A girl hands her boyfriend her phone and says it's his dad. He throws it on the ground exclaiming, "My dad's not a phone, duh!"

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Why did the bird fall out of the sky? Someone shot it.

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What do you call a Black guy who flies planes? A pilot

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What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other? Whatever her name is.

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Why can't the little girl ride a bike? She has Osteoporosis and falling would shatter her bones.

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What do you call a psychic midget who has escaped from prison? Wanted by the police.

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Why did piglet look down the toilet for pooh? He had a horrible mental illness

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why couldn't the little boy sleep? he was being tortured.

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BEST PLACE IN THE WORLD COPENHAGEN !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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How did poor Miss Suzy get her poor little baby to stop crying? She cut off its head, burned its body, and sacrificed its ashes in a bizarre Satanic ritual that involved having sex with a heifer. (Miss Suzy was a Satanist priestess.)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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