Once upon a time

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Dakota Fanning

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Knock knock Who's there? NYPD you are being placed under arrest come out with your hands up.

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how do you call a big red creature eating rocks? the big red rock eating creature.

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Pianos.

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What starts with f and ends in uck? Firetruck.

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why was the old man on the ground he fell

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the man was talking to a phone no answered cause he talking to a brick wall

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Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

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Q: What did blue say to red? A: Let's make some purple

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Parkinson's dl;ghd;jgfldsj;foshdgoljdlkfnjslpaoijejknjvnoidnmaokepinjndonfvio

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Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?".

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Bin laden walks into a bar oh wait he's dead.

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what do you get if you cross the mafia and the yakuza? a hefty bounty on your head

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how do you tell a politician that you hate him? politicians can be female, too.

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What do you get when you cross a crocodile and a couch? A coat because vests don't have sleeves.

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Dimes are silver Pennies are brass Why does your face look like an a**

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What do you call Morgan Freeman at a family reunion? Morgan Freeman.

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What's white and horny? a unicorn.

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Q: What's your dog's name ? A: Dog. Q: What's your cat's name ? A: Cat. Q: What's your dick's name A: Pinky

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Why did the squirrel fall out of a tree? It was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of a tree? It was cruelly stapled to the first one.

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What is yellow and bright? The sun.

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"Knock knock," said the guy about to deliver a knock knock joke.

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what did steven hawking say to the prostitute? Nothing, he is unable to speak, he needs help from his word speaker thing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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