What did Tom get for Christmas? Gloves, but Tom had no arms.

what does mandy enjoy on weekends a load of cum in her face

Why couldn't the grandma remember what she did last night? Because she has Alzeihmers and grandmas don't do anything.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally, she has no arms.

Your Face... It's Beautiful.

A girl hears a noise in the middle of the night in her kitchen downstairs. She walks down halfway through the staircase and asks if anyone is there, as if the intruder will say, "Yes, I'm in the kitchen. Want me to make you a sandwich?" *This will never happen. Movies are stupid when it comes to these scenes. No one will actually ask if anybody is there if they hear a noise in the middle of the night.*

Why do girls enjoy listening to Justin Biebers music? Because he sings moderately well and appeals to a younger audience.

What did the oak tree say to the pine tree? Nothing tress dont speak regardless of the kind.

Why couldn't the little girl swing? She didn't have any limbs.

What do you do when you say shut up to someone and they say make me? Rip out their vocal cords.

Hi

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: You were adopted.

That awkward moment where all you want for Christmas is for your parents to get back together but then you realize that they died in a car crash

ask me if i have a place to call home> 'have you a place to call home?' no im sad and lonely.

wut did the cow say to the other cow thet's get a moo shake

OK, Billy went to his friend Fred in the tree. And then went inside to get a snack. Then Fred fell out of the Tree and.....landed on a comfy mattress.

Whats The Meaning Of Life? 42. But everyone has their own perception so you have your own answer so why the heck did i write this joke. Oh wait Im writing still. The answer is 42.

What do you call a girl who can run faster than me? Virgin

Knock Knock! F*ck off

Why did the girl scream at old people? She had turrets. www.youtube.com/LouisGames www.twitch.tv/KiLM_Ghostz

Why do the children cry at dinner time? Becuase there mother forces them to eat her own faeces and takes pictures of them doing it and posts it on the internet.

Q: Whats worse then a minor fender bender A: Dieing a long painful death by getting stabbed 27 times then getting hit by a car and laying on the side of the rode for 2 hours then you find out that your wife was cheating on you with her your own brouther

A mum and a dad were having guests round for dinner. The daughter overheard them arguing. Dad was calling mum a b*tch and mum was calling dad a b*stard. The daughter asked them what it meant and they just said, "oh, it just means ladies and gentlemen". Later, when mum was doing her makeup, she dropped it and said oh "sh*t". Daughter asked what it meant and mum replked "it's just another word for makeup". After that, dad dropped the turkey and said "oh, F*ck!" Daughter asked what it meant and he replied "its another word for cooking". When the guests arrived, the daughter answered the door, and said "hello b*tches and b*stards. Mums upstairs stuffing sh*t on her face and dads in the kitchen f*cking the turkey".

What was the weather like at the rap concert?there was a lil wayne.I DID A FUNNY! !!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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