Why was Jimmy sad? Because he was about to be shot for attempting to assassinate the president.

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Alien vs. Predator = Evil Staplers vs. Evil Jamaicans

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a Dyslexic, Agnostic, Insomniac stayed up all night, wondering if there really was a dog.

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so your paddling up stream in a cement canoe, one wheel falls off. how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 46 cause bears dont like eggs.

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When life gives you lemon, Squeeze lemon juice in life's eyes Rape it And demand oranges

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What do you call a black doctor? Doctor.

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How do you suppress a black hole? Surround it with white holes

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What's brown and has four wheels? Wood, I lied about the wheels.

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What is colored and looks good hanging from trees? Oranges. Get your mind out of the gutter!

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What did the apple say to the Banana? ....Nothing... fruit don't talk

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Remember when Jesse Ziegenbein was skinny?

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Why did the chicken successfully cross the road? It didn't in the middle of the street it got hit by a car.

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Why's it so bad to be black and Jewish? You have to sit in the back of the oven.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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whats an aids victims last wish not to have aids

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Why couldn't Stephen Hawking run a marathon? He was struck by a very serious disease, otherwise known as refrigerator to the face, at the age of 5.

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A blind man walks into a bar. Another man asks him if hes ever seen the new movie that came out. he then replies, "i heard it" then curled up into a ball and cries for several hours.

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what do jews, blacks, and asians have in common? they have all been targets of racism!

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Roses are red, violets are blue. This is a poem about flowers.

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Q. Why did the squirrel cross the road? A. Because it was stapled to the chicken.

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Why Did The Boy Fall Off The Swing? Because He Had No Arms.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven threatened six's family after insinuations of seven being a cannibal.

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whats long, hairy, and has one eye? my cat fluffy, he has cancer.

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Rubies are red Some diamonds are blue I have candy so get in my car

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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