Roses are red, violets are blue, some people are gay, and so are you

Say silk 5 times. Silk Silk Silk Silk Silk Now what do cows drink? Water.

Your mother is so fat that when she goes to the movies, she usually orders popcorn and maybe a drink.

Sarah Jessica Parker

why did the chicken cross the road? IDGAC

roses are red violets are blue i have five fingers the middle ones for you

What do you call an Arab driving a Plane? A Pilot.

Why was the guy with six fingers called John? His name was John.

Your cat was in pain after after a stack of books suddenly fell on it. It's pain is extra-strong so you give it ExtraStrength Tylenol. Guess what happens next time? Nothing. It takes only 50mg to 60mg of Tylenol to poison a cat. 1 ExtraStrength Tylenol tablet is about 10 times that amount (500mg). You killed your cat. It's dead now and there is no "next time"..

What's funnier than the holocaust? Just about everything seeing how the holocaust is not a funny event, but rather enormous tragedy.... Assholes.

Q:What do you call a wizard who flies? A: A flying wizard.

Two guys walk into a bar. Whoops did I say bar? I meant Hiroshima 1945. They got radiation poisoning and died slow painful deaths.

what is the difference between an octopus and a dead dolphin? one as tentacles the other is dead.

How many Black People does it take to change a lightbulb? One. Changing a lightbulb is a very simple task.

Schrödinger's cat walks into a bar And doesn't

womens rights.

Roses are red Violets are blue Poetry is hard And so is wood

If a canoe is stuck in a tree with its headlights on, howmany pancakes does it take to cover the roof of my house? False, snakes don't have armpits!

What's the difference between a woman and the Universe ? One is full of mysteries mankind may never understand, the other is, well, the Universe.

What kind of drug did the cops catch the alligator with? None. They were going to use a tranquiliser dart, but SPCA intervened and simply held the alligator's mouth shut while they loaded it into a secure cage.

What happened to thepeanut who went to NYC? He was assulted

what do you call and man that has a twitch every time someone say tissue broken arm, leg, hand, collar bone and there iphone? A mentally and physically demented man that needs serious help from a psychotherapist otherwise matter would get increasingly worse

Roses are black violets are black We are all black?! SHIT IM COLOUR BLIND

Q: Suzy loves apples, she will do anything to get her hands on an apple. Why didn't she eat Tom's apple? A: She ate someone elses apple and then he killed her before she could get to tom's!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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