whats worse than god meaner than the devil. the poor have it the rich need it nothing

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Adeeeellllleeeee where are my shorts

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How do you know your roommate is gay? His dick tastes like shit.

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Your mama's so fat, she cries daily and regularly questions her purpose in life.

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When is it ok to drink urine? When you're Bear Grills

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-Whats not funny and has wheels? >What? -The Holocaust... I was lying about the wheels

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why did the man drop his razor? he had a seizure.

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What is the reward for the pimp who banged a bitch? HIV

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Take wrong turns

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? Still a pilot.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? Because he has no arms.

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Whats similar about an elephant and a plum? Theyre both gray, except for the plum

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question: do zombies eat brains answer: actually zombies don't exist, so they don't eat anything

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so today i took a poop. hehe

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your mommas so fat she has been advised to diet and excercise or run the risk of terminal illness

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What's sad about four black people in a Cadillac driving off a cliff? Jerome never wanted it to end like this. James, his best friend, was drunk... Again. That was just the way he was. He got wasted, did something stupid, apologized, and then did it again. But this time, there would be no next time. They were supposed to be going to their graduation party, but instead, James fell asleep at the wheel. The cliff was rapidly approaching, and the doors were locked. All Jerome could do now was pray. Also, the Cadillac costed a lot.

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Two Jews walked into a bar. Then bought it.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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*knock knock* Who's there? ...Who's there?... *opens door to find a dead baby on the front door step*

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Why do British Folk have yellow teeth? Genetics. Although scientists don't know the exact cause, it has been shown that people of British ancestory have a genetic predisposition which inhibits the body's breakdown and utilization of Vitamin C and Calcium. This causes decalcification and scorbutic gums. The British slang term "Limey" comes from the fact that the British Royal Navy was made to drink lime juice to prevent scury. The Royal Navy was almost wiped out by an epidemic of Scurvy.

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What's the difference between a black male and a white female? There are many differences but all of which are wrong to make a joke about.

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What's the difference between Hurricane Sandy and Barrack Obama? One is a catastrophic event that resulted in thousands of deaths, countless power outages and homes destroyed, and millions of dollars in damages, and is said to be one of the worst tropical storms to ever hit the nation. The other is the President of the United States, who has put in an unbelievable amount of effort to fix our economy, create jobs, and make America a better place to live. So as you can see, the two things are extremely different. One must wonder why this question was even asked in the first place, as one is a human being and the other is a storm, making any common traits between them almost non-existent.

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Peter

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Roses are red Tulips are blue Wait, no sorry That's violets.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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