wht does a blonde do with a box of crayons? eat a taco.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

What did Edward Cullen say to the hot girl? Since I am a vampire it is impossible for me to get an erection.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

I walked into temptation yesterday, He said hi.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

mark lawson likes boys

thumb_up thumb_down -43

your mommas so fat she jumped for joy and got stuck

thumb_up thumb_down -43

What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is a human profession, and the other is a type of fish.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A catfish could never pass the LSAT because it is unable to perform high-level critical thinking.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Q:why did the man jump of the house A:he did not I threw a frige at him

thumb_up thumb_down -47

Without geometry life would be pointless

thumb_up thumb_down -49

A man walks into a bar. It was a salad bar, so he left.

thumb_up thumb_down +64

Why didn't Anne Frank answer the door? Because it was the German SS.

thumb_up thumb_down +60

My penis is so big that some women find it uncomfortable.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Knock, knock Who's there? Man Man who? The man who is knocking. Now open the door Carl!

thumb_up thumb_down +44

A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says "Hey, we've got a drink named after you!". The grasshopper turns and says "You've got a drink named Steve?"

thumb_up thumb_down +44

:) Hey AMBY VALENT! Want to join our horsehead show below?? *Laughing track with that fat loud bitch that wont stop laughing making the actors stare at each other like douches* :/ Muuh, I dont really care im just some meh character anyway so yuh...' *Laughing track* ? ???? ORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORA! :( Hey get outta our show here you China man! *OOOH! Track plays with some fa*ott whistling* ? ???? | Baka! *leaves* *Awww track plays* *Laughing track*

thumb_up thumb_down +44

whats brown and fluffy? brown fluff

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Why was the Jamaican man smoking pot? His doctor prescribed it. The man has a serious case of glaucoma.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Q: When is a door not a door? A: Before it has been asembled or after it has been taken down and no longer maintains the physical form of that which a door typically has.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What happens when two elephants go out in the rain? They get wet.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But I have cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Why couldn't 7 multiply itself by 18? Because there were two people having sex in between them.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What is the difference between baseball and the holocaust? One is a fun sporting event…. The other is baseball.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Why did the frog commute suicide ? Because His mother was a type writer

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops