A blonde went to buy a Pizza and after ordering, the assistant asked the blonde if she would like her pizza cut into six pieces or twelve. "Six please" she said, "I could never eat twelve!"

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what is the ??? crust^2 + Cool Whip

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There were two blondes at an ATM. One was entering her PIN number and the other one says, "Haha! I know your password! It's ****!" The other one replies, "Haha! No, it's 1358."

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What do you get if you mix a baby with a blender? A prison sentence.

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A man dies from a cat attack. he goes up to heaven. At the gates, St. Peter asks him, " how did you die sir?" The man doesn't reply so Peter says, "cat got your tongue?" "No," he says, "cat got my throat!"

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a man walks into a casino, it's the third time this week and he's contemplating suicide.

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Why was the boy put on his socks? So he wouldn't get blisters.

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Jimmy tells his mom he wants to be a Firefighter when he grows up to which the mother replies, "You can't Jimmy, you have leukemia."

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Q: What do you say to a person in a wheelchair who fall downs the stairs? A: Nothing because most likely they would take an elevator.

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Why did Bob fall off the swim? He had no arms or legs.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Can you pass the soda? Sure.

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Why did the man die? because he hit his head and drowned

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What did the Black man get after a month's worth of manual labour? A reasonable wage, that was above the national minimum wage standard which states his and everyones right to a certain amount of money

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a dyslexic boy prays to dog.

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Chip and Dale walk into a bar. Chip is black now.

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give a man a blow job and he'll come for a second. teach a man to blow job and .... no that just doesn't work

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What is the difference between a blond and a red-head? They have different hair colors.

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Rose are red, Violets are blue, I have AIDS, Now so do you.

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What is shit? It's Deshitified already.

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name one pop artist who's better than Michael Jackson that's really hard. there's so many

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why couldnt the little boy watch two and a half men? because charlie sheen left and the other guy had surgeery and now has 2 penises

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What's the difference between a sewer pipe and a French fry? A lot

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how do you open a can of coke with no tab? throw a washing machine at it

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Why did the girl lie to the priest? because she didn't want to tell him the truth

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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