Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

i dont fisish anythi

a man makes a bad joke

Jamie stegman has no life he is a nerd while his sister is giving him a z-j while jacob comes in and starts rubbing the lamp and then the crazy man ate the orange then farted in all of there face. NeonFAILsky xoxo

What do you get when you see a black man writing? A man devoted to getting a education.

What do you get when you put the head of a lion on the body of an eagle?2 dead animals and a fine for killing protected species.

What did the black do when a man robbed his house? He called 911

I couldn't afford a hair cut... So i contracted cancer.

two men walk into a bar. they get a concussion.

Knock Knock Who's There? Bill Bill Who? Builder

How do you get a priest to cry? Stab him.

So i know this guy... yes? thats it.

What's moist wet and I put my finger in it? My nose.

Next Q: What's worse than a bee sting? A: Two bee stings. Q: What's worse than two bee stings? A: Three bee stings. Q: What's worse than three bee stings? A: Sexual assault.

Why has Bugs Bunny got big ears Because he's a rabbit

Bruce Forsith's energy and charisma.

A chicken crosses the road... Gets fined for jaywalking.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

An Asian tries to climb a staircase in a wheelchair. He finds this difficult, because he is in a wheelchair.

Elvis presley was taking a poop and couldnt poop cause he was dead.

How do you get a dog to stop humping you? Pick him up and suck his dick.

why didn't the chicken cross the road ? because half way acroos he got hit by a car and the animal heath care had to take him away and put him down

Why was Edgar sad at the swimming pool? Edgar had been taking swimming lessons for a few weeks, on a tuesday-thursday basis, and was not learning how to swim as well as he would have liked. His instructer, Ms. Herpina was also very rude and generally disrespectful to Edgar. As a result of him seeing the lack of progress, and his dislike of his teacher, one day he quit going to his lessons and went to the local Dairy Queen instead with his girlfriend, Susie. Little did he know, his mother had also gone out to buy him DairyQueen, as a celebration to him becoming better at swimming. When she saw him at Dairy Queen, she was very angry at her son, who had lied to her about going to that days' lesson, and had also lied to her about not having a girlfriend. After his mom told his girlfriend that they couldn't date, she took a distraught Edgar to their small apartment. Edgar had always hated this apartment, ever since the first day they moved in as a result from the lack of money to afford a nicer area. After his older brother David stole all that money from his mother to buy drugs a few years back, his life hasn't been the same. His mother was forced to move into an apartment with few luxories, and Edgar was constantly jealous of his friends at school, especially Jason, the dark haired boy who always bragged about how good he was at his PSP games. Edgar only wanted happiness for at least a little while, but was quickly forced back to the pool. He was embarassed at the fact that he couldn't swim, and all the popular girls at the pool were making fun of him. It had been a rough life for Edgar, and he was still only seven years of age. This, my child, is why Edgar was sad at the swimming pool.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have ADD Oooh a cloud

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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