Hey, wanna here a dirty joke? A pig fell in mud.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was black

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theres this guy that i REALLY like but today he was putting something in my locker, it was gumbie the little green bendy thing but i didnt want it to be in my locker so i slammed my locker, except the only thing was that his pinky was in the way!!!! oh gosh i felt soooooo bad!!!! turns out he went to the hostpital and got stitches!!!!!!! that made it worse on me!!!!!! he said he was finee but i still cant let that go!!!!!

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Why did Alfa Kurtoo change his name? Just say Alfa Kurtoo fast!

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Q: Why Did The Family Eat Olive Garden For Dinner A: Because it was a simple way to please everyone but letting them choose their own meal

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Why did the man smoke pot in the roller coaster? Because he was dyslexic and read the sign wrong and thought it read "You must be high to go on this ride."

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what is the difference between a car salesman and a lawyer? a car salesman sells cars to people while a lawyer is an expert in law.

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A Chinese man a Mexican and an American are all on a plane. They are all trying to get rid of stuff they have to much of in their country. The chinese man throws out a bowl of rice and says " we have to many of these in our country" the mexican throws out a taco and says " we have to many of these in our country" the American throws out the mexican and says "we have to many of these in our country"

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What's hanging by a rope from the tree in my backyard? A tire swing.

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Things to do get an A on my test win my hockey game become immortal well that escalated quickly

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Why was the jew so happy? He won the lottery which at the time was 3.40 dollars

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Roses are red, Violets are Violets. Screw this poem. Potato.

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How many fingers do most people have? 10

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-Have you ever seen an elephant hidden behind a thread? -No. -How come you're seeing it, he's hidden.

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- What do you call a black man who drives a bus? - An african american bus driver.

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Knock Knock. Knockin on Heavens door, oh hey come in

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A:Hi, do you like to blow bubbles? B:Yea... A:Hi, my names bubbles

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1100110001012....HOLY S@&$ A 2!

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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Why did Bob get off the swing? Because he was done.

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Knock Knock I'm sorry but the new don't ask don't tell laws require me to not answer but do feel free to come in for some tea.

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What do you call a muffin with frosting? A cupcake

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Jesse is so fat, his weight on his scale says " hahaha gotta love childhood obesity"

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There were three guy's caught trespassing on a farmers land. The farmer said he wont kill them if they did what they were told, he told everyone to pick one fruit. The 1st guy came to him with grapes. The farmer told him to shove it up his butt so he did, the 2nd guy came to the farmer with orange, the farmer told him to shove them up his butt but the guy kept laughing, the farmer got angry and snapped whats so funny? My buddy over over there is picking watermelons.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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