Q: What's the difference between a stick in the road and a baby in the road? A: You swerve around the stick

thumb_up thumb_down -15

You're flying above the Kansas Ocean, you lose your brakes and have to paddle all the way to shore. How many dogs can you fit on a carousel? Blue, because Ice Cream is cold.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q: How do you solve a problem like Maria. A: You kill her. You kill Maria.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A kangaroo walks into a bar, he hops up to the bartender, and asks for a martini. The bartender, not knowing exactly what to do, goes into the back to his boss's office. He says "Hey, there's a kangaroo up front askin' for a martini...do we serve kangaroos?" His boss replies "Ya, of course, but these kangaroos, they aren't too smart, so charge him like 50 bucks for the drink." The bartender agrees and goes back up front to serve the kangaroo. He pours the martini and hands it to the kangaroo, the kangaroo thanks him and says "How much do I owe you?" The bartender replies "50 bucks." The kangaroo then reaches into his pouch, pulls out a fifty dollar bill, and puts it on the counter. He finishes his drink and begins to hop away. As he is leaving, the bartender says "Hey, wait, we don't get many of your kind around here, why is that?" And the kangaroo replies "I'm not surprised at THESE prices!!!" and hops out.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Here is the worst joke ever. ..... Dislike this and you are awesome!! P.S. I'm serious. I want to make a joke with the MOST DISLIKES ever! Don't think this is reverse psychology. I don't do that shi*t.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Yo Momma so fat, that the doctor prescribed her prescription drugs that deal with her eating disorder and recommended that she begin a low calorie diet and live a more active lifestyle.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

wanna hear a joke? me niether.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the Nazi Death Camp Guard say to the escaping prisoner? - Nothing. He shot him in his face.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q: How do you make an mail man cry? A: Take his car and run over his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did one pare say to the other ... ... WE MAKE A GREAT PARE!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why isn't eating an Olympic sport? Because that wouldn't make any sense.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q: What do you get when you throw a piece of bread in the oven? A: 6 million Jews

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Knock knock Who's there? No one you care bout so why did u say who's there?

thumb_up thumb_down -15

roses are red violets are blue i am muslim

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what do you call a tall skiny kid with a very big ego autistic

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Who is big and stupid My brother

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's worst then finding a worm in your apple Eating it.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

haiku for you ladies and gents My mother once said, "Slow and steady wins the race" She died in a fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

You know what is worse than being dead...being at a Justin Bieber concert

thumb_up thumb_down -17

roses are red violet are blue what are you gonna do when chuck norris find you

thumb_up thumb_down -17

why did Susay fall of the swing? Cause she had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did your mom make me for Christmas... ...An apple pie because she is a very nice lady

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops