After pursuing a speeding vehicle for 10km at speeds ranging from 120 - 160km/h, the police officer managed to stop the driver. The driver of the vehicle rolled down the window and asked, "What seems to be the problem officer?" to which the police officer replied, "It sounds like one of your cylinders is firing incorrectly, you have a fairly large amount of carbon build-up on and around your exhaust pipe."

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What did the president say after his wife and kids left Him? Im Obama self now

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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Say silk 5 times. Silk Silk Silk Silk Silk Now what do cows drink? Water.

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Fish don't run.

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How many of amanda todd's frinds does it take to change a lightbulb? Trick question, she doesn't have any

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Get in the van.

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How did the Holocaust start? Hitler threw a penny into the oven

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How do you sabotage someone's car? Drop a fridge on it

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Whats red and yellow? A chicken in the blender.

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Why can't the T-rex clap? Because it's extinct

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What do Ethiopians do at night? Starve

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Smell your breath Coamhin you smelly cunt

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What goes in dry, comes out wet and pleases two people. A teabag, you pervert.

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what do u call a apple a apple

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs gets for Christmas? Cancer

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What's red and smells like paint? Red paint.

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What hurts worse than a papercut? Divorce.

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Yo momma so fat she when god said let there be let he said get the fuck out the way!

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what do you do when you see a black man getting hitted by a Mexican taxi? -Call 911

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So a guy walks into a bar. He asks the woman next to him, ''Can I buy you a drink?'' The woman says,''No thank you.''

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You shove her off the bed

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have you seen ray charles' house? neither has he.

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Why did the black guy scream? well, he just saw his friend get shot, and there was blood everywhere.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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