Why was Sally lying on the ground? Cause she was dead

How do you have problems paying your monthly mortgage if you live in a box emmanuel

do you know what happened to the bravest warrior in the battle who got stabbed in the foot while trying to rescue puppies from a burning building and dying children? well he took the children and puppies home, and ate them. then the SWAT came in and killed him. so yeah... oh... suck my a s s barf

what did the clock say to the other clock? .. were both lawyers!

Roses are grey Violets are gray Tulips are grey Lilly's are grey Dandelions are grey Daisy's are grey Daffodils are grey I am colour blind.

Chuck norris is seen standing outside a bakery in Paris holding numchucks. He just finished lunch

What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

when your cable is on the fritz, you play video games instead. when you play video games, you get good. when you get good, you go to COD XP. when you go to COD XP, you lose to whiteboy 7th st. when you lose to whiteboy 7th st., you get into Skyrim. when you get into skyrim, you reenact cut scenes from skyrim. and when you reenact cut scenes from skyrim... ...you take an arrow to the knee... ...don't take an arrow to the knee. Get rid of cable.

How do we know that Adam was white? We don't. The Bible doesn't specify the race or etnicity of either Adam or Eve.

one day 2 strawberrys walked to the ice cream store and ordered a small cup of banana ice cream they were realley happy they were later taken in and tortured and raped

How do you kill 23 kids? You put 24 kids in an arena.

Friends are a lot like trees... ...they fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

What is brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

What did the munchy alzhemiers farmer say about his missing tractor? Where's my tators?

What is the diffrence between a monkey... An apple because the more the much. :) :| :| :|

What is the same between a turtle and an eagle? They both fly, apart from the turtle.

why did the chicken cross the road? to commit suicide.

Nyan cat had pancakes for breakfast.

Knock Knock whose there YOUR MOM

Your so fat that you have a 75% chance increase of dying from congenital heart failure.

What does a dyslexic person do on sundays? Goes to church to pray to Dog

Knock knock who is there ? i'm an orphaned, sir can you tell me why did you write who "is" instead of who's ?? because than i will have to use the (') key and its very far not to mention that i have to use the shift key do u want a pizza ? how much ? 50 cents ? get the hell out ? im not even in yet !

If there are four gay men that come into a bar and need to sit down when all you have is one stool; what do you do? Get three more stools.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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