You are so average that, if you entered an average contest, you'd come in middle place.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have amnesia Roses are red

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text your mom saying you need help, then turn on vibrate and shove the phone up your ass.

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Q. what did the gay man say about the smoothie? A. he said "that is soooo good"

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What do you call a hard working black man? A hard working black man.

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What did the dog say to the cat? "Bark."

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Why w\s the English man, the French man, the German man, the Indian man, the Chinese man, the Irish man, the American man and the russian man all on a train together? They where going to the olympics.

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Knock knock Who's there This is the police, open the door. I don't know anybody by that name

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you thought i was going to write a joke.. bitch

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Oh yeah? Well you're as gay as this joke!

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How do you get santa to stop delivering presents? Kill your parents.

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Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 8 had a lot of PCP went crazy and shoved a gun down 6's throat

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Gotta go Fast Gotta go Faster Faster Fasterfasterfaster! Moving at the speed of sound I'm the quickest hedgehog around Got ourselves a situation Start getting a new location Without any explanation On top of relaxation! Go- Go- Go- Don't blink Don't think Just Go go go go G-g-g-g-go go! Sonic, he's on the run Sonic, he's number one Sonic, he's coming next so watch out for Sonic X! Gotta go fast, gotta go faster faster faster fasterfasterfaster Go go go go go go go go go! Sooooniiiiic X!!

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What's the difference between dead babies and Christmas lights? I don't have Christmas lights hanging on my Christmas tree...

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I nicknamed my diick "the truth" because the biitches can't handle it

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KASEEM IS CRAP AT GEARS OF WAR THIS IS NOT A JOKE ITS TRUE (FACT) PLAYSTATION IS BETTER THEN XBOX (BIGGEST JOKE EVER) IV HAD BOTH, SO SHUT UP PS3 BOYS AKA GIRLS

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Roses are red violets are orange......... Wait did I do that wrong?

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one swipe, i call this one the cinderella story if you HAH! know what i mean, Paul....are you ok?....nooo...., you know the lettuce in antarctica is pretty questionable

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Badgers are cool

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What do you call a pen sitting on a counter? A righting utensil not being currently used.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get back up? She had no legs. Why couldn't she see? The sun was in her eyes.

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your mums so fat she has to use a matress as a tampon

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Three men were lost in a desert when a genie appeared and granted them each a wish. they died of dehydration shortly afterward, never realizing they were hallucinating.

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Why did Kristi drop her chap-stick? Kristi was of the many children held in hostage of the Jewish heritage during the times of Hitler's wrath. At the Concentration camps they were not given the opportunity to maintain a healthy, average diet thus decreasing her body strength. No longer could Kristi hold her chap-stick - alas her frail little fingers slowly released the cylinder shaped tube and hopelessly watched it hit the ground. As it hit the ground, a cloud of dust swept over Kristi's body. At the same time Kristi was taking a big whiff of fresh air (just kidding, the air at concentration camps were not fresh - it reeked of acid) she accidentally inhaled the dirt which fled through her body and made her faint. She woke up and it was a dream, lol.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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