A worm slowly crawled through the ground, only to be eaten by an incoming bird.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I was hoping you could tell me–why else would I ask you a question?

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why am i so pretty? because god blessed me with good looks

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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What did little Sally say to the clown after the party? 'For someone who specializes in entertaining children of a young age, I am slightly underwhelmed at the degree of humor my friends and I have derived from your jokes today.'

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why did the zack fall off his bike because his mum thew a frege at him

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What's worse then a bad hair day? Hattie.

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What do you get when you cross a donkey and a hemophiliac? A bleeding ass!

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How do you wake up lady gaga? Shoot her in the head repeatedly

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what did the man see in the mirror? Nothing, he was blind.

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Sorry boss

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "How's it going?" The man replies, "Bless you." The man walks out of the bar, as his peers realize he was honest when he told them a week earlier that he had autism.

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What happens when you murder someone? The Government murders you.

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What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Unless you're paralyzed.

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what do you call a little girl next to a mexican? a rape victim.

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guess what? chicken butt.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin Holy shit a talking muffin

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what do you call a black man who is flying a plane? A: a piolt

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Why did the dude fall? Because he tripped over a stick.

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Q:Why do people not live forever? A: Because they die dumbass.

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Why does snoop dogg carry around an umbrella?? ......fo drizzle

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What happens when you walk by two black men? You walk by two black men.

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What do you call a giggling penguin? Personification.

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When I'm sad I cut myself... another slice of cheesecake.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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