It was a dark night, I was walking home from the shops in town, The wind was whistling through my damp hair, My spine tingled and i tucked my hands under my stinking pits. I felt like someone was watching me, I walked faster the breath was warm on my kneck i turned around. It was gary glitter he pulled down my pants and gave me the best sucky i ever had. We kissed and i tasted the cheese from my knob. In all garry glitter has a giant knob

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Patients: Whats happening doctor Doctor: I am afraid you all have tested positive Patients: Oh No!!! Doctor: Positive for being great friends all these years! Patients: Oh Doctor you are so.... Doctor: ASWELL AS AIDS!!!

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A black man walks into a bar and says, "ouch."

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What's the difference between a live baby and a dead baby? A dead baby doesn't cry.

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Your momma's so dumb, she had to spend an extra hour studying for her mathematics test.

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Q: What weighs 6 ounces, is extremely dangerous, and lives in a tree? A: A sparrow with a machine gun.

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What did the kid say when he fell of a cliff and met Tom jones? Hi

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what's the difference between a box of dead babies and a corvette? I don't have a corvette in my garage!

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Why did the child get hit by a bus? He was blind.

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they've may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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What's worse than losing the remote Finding it in your ass hole

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When life gives you lemons, you realise that life isn't a physical object and therefore you have problems. Have a nice day.

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Knock Knock!! Who's There? No one, your being ding dong ditched!

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what's the worst thing ever? reality TV shows and singing contest shows

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what's brown and sticky? A stick

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your momma is so dumb.. ... because she was a slacker in high school but then turned her life around and is now a respected member of society

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Yo momma's so fat, she slipped into a diabetic coma.

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here is Stevie Wonder's poem: sjkgfhdujduehfheuefeufhhf uefuefg eufbejfbefehfehutuge' wiohl;wreohqweiothurelwueths sjtghekltrhlsdifhlziurhlsiurhtwoli

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What did Tim say about his wife cheating on him with his best friend's wife? He ran to R Kelly and got peed on.

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roses are red facebook is blue no mutual friends who the heck are you

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How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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How do you know a French guy has been in your back yard? Your thrash cans are empty and your dog's pregnant

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Why did the boy want to commit suicide? Because he didn't want to die.

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Why did i write this? I was bored

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops