whats the difference between jimmy saville and a horse? jimmy has a bigger cock

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it got out of it coop and there was something shinny on the other side of the street.

Q:what did a keppy kid with a big nose say A:hi im josh Roberts

An Antihumorous Story Part One A rich man named Richard told his son James that he could have anything in the world for his thirteenth birthday. James only asked for one thing: a silver box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. So Richard gave him a metal box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. Five years later, Richard heard a strange noise coming from James' room. It was the sound of a machine whirring, then a high pitched scream. All of a sudden, James bursted out of his room and ran out of the house. Later, the boy could not recall the incident. It was completely erased from his memory. For his eighteenth birthday, James asked for a golden box containing 785 pink ping balls. So it was granted him. For the next ten years, Richard kept a careful eye on his son. Every night, James could be heard whispering madly, "It's almost ready," over and over. For his twenty-eighth birthday, James asked for a simple wooden box that had one million pink ping pong balls inside. "What do you need all those pink ping pong balls for?" Richard finally asked. James froze, fiddling with something in the pocket of his jacket. "Oh yes, that. They were necessary for--" Then he got hit by a bus.

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Well that, my friend, is a good question.

A legless and armless woman is laying on the beach. A man walks by and hears her crying. "What's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been kissed before" says the woman. So the man leans down and kisses her. The next day the man sees the woman crying at the beach again. "What's wrong this time?" asks the man. "I've never been hugged before" So the man picks up the legless and armless woman and gives her a big hug. The next day the man sees the woman still on the beach crying. "Okay now what's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been f---ked before" says the woman. So the man picks up the woman, and has sex with her. They end up going on several dates later on and getting married at sunset on the very beach where they met.

why do you care?

A pussy walks into a bar and orders a drink, the bar keeper asks " why are you such a pussy!" The pussy then says, "it's not my fault I'm a cat!" before getting run over

If E = cos[(6x+8) + 5x!] + tan(90-X)^2, and x = 137/43, what is E? The fifth letter of the alphabet.

my friend is gay hes gay

What does rainbow stand for? Rick Astley Is Nesting By Our Window to harass us

Your mom is intimately familiar with many mens' penis due to her many years as a successful urologist.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

What do you call a flying jew? Smoke.

What's black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

How many blacks does it take to screw in a light bulb? blacks don't work

Why was Soren gay? Because he likes to eat men's Penises!

What's worse than doing the dishes with long sleeves? Finding out your girlfriend's been cheating on you.

how many jews can you fit in a buick? six if you squeeze 4 in the back

There's a bunch of people standing around a retard...why is no one laughing? Its his funeral

Why was the boy sitting alone? Because all his friends died.

What's the best thing about 27 year old's? There are 20 of them.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why didnt she get back up? She had no friends.

det va en tjej som va inne på ica och handlade, framme vid kassan la hon fram en banan, en billys pizza, ett litet paket bröd och en mjölk. -är du singel eller? frågar killen i kassan -ja hur visste du det, svarar hon -du e skitful ju

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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