How do you kill a blonde? you shoot her.

Knock knock. Who's there? John John who John

Why the girl fell from the swing? cause she had no arms

Why did the blonde kill herself? She was diagnosed with major depression and was dealing with a lot of traumatic events in her life.

Kenny died. The Bastards.

Q: If Jack Bauer is partially gay, then what are you? A: His sidekick -Ryan Vallee

Why is a blonde a door knob... Because everybody gets a turn

Why was the boy crying? Because his parents were in a car crash and died and his grandparents were already dead and he got cancer for christmas. And he had no testicles

why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. Why did the man get a check in the mail every month? Cause he's black Why did Obama Cross the road? Cause he lost control of congress

Roses are red violets are blue we're stuck together like superglue roses go brown violets go darker cut the crap and the stupid laughter...I just went through a breakup

A dentist, a librarian, a construction worker, a gynecologist, a zookeeper, a shoemaker, a terrorist, a politician, a cyclist, a truck driver, a kangaroo, a Mexican, a blonde, a Jewish black guy, a Honda Civic, a monkey, a penguin, an FBI agent, a stock broker, a president of a foreign country, a CEO of a very wealthy company regarding AIDS, a founder of one of top downloaded apps in the market, a chief executive, a cook, a waitress, a priest, a nun, a little boy, a fairy, a dinosaur, and a skeleton walks into a bar. There's no punchline.

What did the fat girl say to her friend? I'm fat.

What's worse than a 15 year old getting hit by a car? Adam Johnson

What did the blind man look at when the girl showed him her cleavage ? ... Nothing... He's blind... >_>

How much does a polar bear weigh? The average male weights approximately 1150lbs.

Q. why was Martin Luther King assassinated? A. he wasn't his son was

Get in the Batmobile.

A man sees a bum laughing. He asks the bum "Why are you laughing", at which point the bum replies "I'm a bum!"

Yor Mama is soooooooooooo fat, when she looked in da mirror... it cracked.

Whats the best way to get chewing gum out of your hair? Cancer.

What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come home from camp.

what do yo call two dog? dogs.

What is shaped like a duck without a beak? A duck that I punch the beak off of.

A moose walks into a corner store and asks the lady where the Mashed potatoes are. The lady working behind the corner says "Down Aisle five..." The moose goes down aisle five and there are no Mashed Potatoes. -Tyler the Creator

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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