A man walks into a bar. Now I have to kill you, because that's top secret information.

if a green person is sitting on a green couch in his green room in his green house on his green lawn in his green town, what color is the sky? blue of course. while it is possibe to paint or make all things described in the above paragraph, you cannot paint the sky green because it is actually the color of light when the suns rays reflect on the water droplets within the ozone layer, thus forming the sky. the sky is not a tangible object, so therfore the paint would not be able to properly rest and dry onto the surface.

What did the turkey call the chicken? Nothing, turkeys can't speak, idiot.

Two women are sitting quietly in a corner, minding their own business.

why did the feminist cross the road? To suck my D***

Whats worse then being raped? Nothing it will ruin your life.

Why was the bear rushing home after work? Because he was late for dinner.

Larry: Why did the chick cross the road? Jeff: Chick? Don't you mean chicken? Larry: Just answer the question. Jeff: Um, why? Larry: Wrong.

I have two hands. Some people dont.

What is funny about 9/11. Nothing, it was a tragic day for the world.

Q: What's the quickest way to a woman's heart? A: Through her ribcage.

What's the difference between a girl's mouth and her vagina? There is none. I want my penis to be inside both of those things.

Get your coat, I've got a knife.

,What would you call Morgan Freeman if he was White? Morgan Freeman

Whats black and smells like white paint? A) Black paint!

What's funny about 4 black people going off a cliff in a Cadillac? Nothing. You're adopted

How do you kill a Chinese man? There are many ways, all of which are horrible

What did the homeless man get for christmas? NOTHING, he died.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Tourette's, Cheese on toast.

Yeah, I assumed so, but I got kinda worried at the same time. Huh... The catchthing says trolololol, no coincidence at all huh? Anyway, take that last comment Nero, I am spent.

Whats worse than finding bubba in your house? Getting raped by a rabid racoon..

Electronic Arts is a respectable company.

What did Greg say to John? Nothing. Greg died in a horrible plane crash

SC Johnson a Family Company

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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