what do you get when you combine a cat and a dog? nothing since it is impossible to combine a cat and a dog

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I like my women how I like my salad. Without a penis.

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I once went seven years without sex, then I turned eight and my uncle raped me.

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What's worse than a truckload of dead babies? Wait a week.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The Gestapo.

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What's blue and fluffy? BLUE FLUFF What's white and fluffy? A BUNNY What's pink and fluffy? PINK FLUFF What's brown and fluffy? A PORCUPINE

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A man with a gun walks into a bar. The police are called and the man was killed quickly.

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What do you call cheese that isn't your's? Someone else's cheese.

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The mighty wizard said "come fourth cowardly lion and receive bravery" but he came fifth and got absolutely nothing. Todo came fourth and got the bravery.

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What's grey got white stripes and can't climb trees? Car park.

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Why did the runner stop farting in the middle of his run? He ran out of gas.

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If you analyze this joke closely you' ll realize its not funny.

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Dave: Hey, Doug! How was your day? Doug: My mother is dead.

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Why cant you find your handle? Because YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

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What do you call a black man on a bicycle? A cyclist.

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What did the white man say to the black man? Hello

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A gay kid and a group of his friends are at the park. Gay: hey can you do a cartwheel? Girl: helllll no! Gay: Are you straight? Girl: Yah? Gay: Im gay and i can do one.

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Q: What do you call a dyslexic Irish man with no legs? A: Handicapped

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How many chicken feathers are there in a 50 pound bag? 50 pounds worth Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a duck Why did the man cross the road? It was duck season A woman is dying but can't reach her husband. Why? A duck ate his cell-phone A pig walks into a bar but there is no bartender. Where is she? Dead A duck hunter is selling a duck to a man. The man only pays the duck hunter a quarter. Why? It was full of chicken feathers.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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How did the asian woman's car get totaled She was hit by a drunk driver

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what did the 3 hispanic men say to the fat guy? you're in our seats

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Where do you find a one-legged cat? Right where you left it.

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How do you make a baby cry? Hit it with a brick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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