Your mother is so white that when she goes to the beach she has to wear sunscrean to avoid being badly sun burned.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the bird

thumb_up thumb_down +45

What happened to the guy who ate an alarm clock at 6 o'clock in the morning? He nearly died, and was diagnosed with numerous dietary problems.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

The doctor comes out of the room and tells the new parents that there is good news and bad news. The couple says they want to hear the bad news first. The doctor says "your baby is black." The couple then ask "what is the good news?", the doctor replies "your baby is dead."

thumb_up thumb_down +45

why couldnt the gay man marry??? cause he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Need homeless tips? Get A Job.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What is worse than being ran over by a bus? Nothing really.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Why did the chicken cross the road? To kill a hooker and get his money back.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What did the cripple kid get for Christmas? Cancer. You know what he got the next the next Christmas? Nothing he died.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

How did the chicken cross the road? On it's chicken wings.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

My aunt used to say slow and steady wins the race she died in a fire

thumb_up thumb_down +41

A Holocaust joke? I did Nazi that coming...Anne, Frankly, I'm quite offended.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

How many nails does it take to build a house? As many as it takes to get the job done.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

A fish swims into a wall. Says dam.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Knock Knock, Who's there? The Police. *No Answer* The police then give the S.W.A.T the signal, bust down the door, and kill 15 high profile targets issued by Liberia. The man who did not answer the door was Carlos Pedrouez, a serial killer, meth addict who has been apart of the Arizona sex slave trade for over a decade. The world can now sleep softly. The door was also red.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Knock Knock Come in, the door's open.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What did the black man do with the piece of bacon? He ate it.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What's the difference between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a lamborghini in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Q: What's white, sticky, and is swallowed by most women? A: Ice Cream

thumb_up thumb_down +35

That moment where the screen shouts "HE MAN" And you look at the guy and go... Hmm did they say He-Man or She-Man? HE MAN!

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why was the black man pulled over? He was going 10 miles over the speed limit.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did the chiocken cross the road? There's no such thing as a chiocken.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Roses are gray Violets are gray I am a dog

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because it was a rather hot day and his attention was momentarily directed towards something else.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops