Q: Whats worse than having a dead car battery? A: Going to prison and getting raped by a black guy

Q: What is long and hard? A: The gun used to kill my parents.

how do you know that harry potter isnt real a ginger has two freinds

Q: I am an over-protective father looking for my son who was kidnapped and am suddenly traveling with a mentally retarded woman who cant remember her name. By the way my wife was murdered and my son has physical disorder. Then, im hooked up with a hippy who doesnt care about anything. Who am I? A: Marlin the clownfish (from Finding Nemo).

Q: Why did the cat roll down the hill? A: It had no legs

American Idol

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

Knock Knock. Who's There? Let Me In. Let Me In Who? Let Me In or I Will Kill You Tomorrow!

I came.

Do you wanna build a snowman? Person: do you wanna live * or nah

Q: Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away? A: The backyard gate was left open

Indeed.

Knock, knock. Who's there? It's Bob. Oh hi, Bob, come on in.

why did i go on the rollercoaster? because there was a muffin on it

Why did the rhino cross the rode? Because it was the chickens day off.

Hey you want to hear a joke? Oh well. Goodbye

My friend said that onions are the only food that could make you cry. That was before I hit him with a watermelon.

Why are white people typically not as good at basketball as black people? They don't have the hard work and dedication as those who are better.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal.

An elephant and a rabbit sit on the forest floor and poop. The elephant asks the rabbit " doesn't it annoy you when the poop sticks to your fur?" "no" replies the rabbit. So the elephant picks up the rabbit and wipes his but with him.

Why did the boy bump into a pole. He was sleep-walking with his eyes closed.

What's worse than a dead baby? A dead puppy.

a carrot walks into a bar, carrots cant walk for they do not have legs.

Why don't women wear watches?...Because the economy is at an all-time low and it would be reasonable to presume that a person couldn't afford an item like this, thus, trying to budget in a watch that could cost anywhere from 50-100$ would be a risky financial move depending on their yearly salary.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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